Something More? ✔️

5

After that day, Penny and James formed a new understanding of each other. They began to enjoy each other's company. In sociology class, they talked freely, and turns out, they shared a lot of the same values. Although Penny devoted herself to art and James to soccer (and of course to taking care of his mother), they understood each other's grit and passion. Their silences were no longer awkward, instead they were a comfortable sort of rest.

When she was with him, she could just relax. She could just be ... herself? Penny even began looking for him at times ...

That was why when Chloe invited her to party on Friday, Penny actually said yes.

"Who's going?" she found herself asking.

Chloe looked up from her phone, and smiled slyly, "Why are you asking? Who you looking for?"

Instantly she flushed red, and busied herself organizing her desk, "I was just curious!"

"I'm messing with you," Chloe laughed, "so far I know Claudia, Zoe, Mark, James and others are going."

She suppressed a smile and nodded. James...

They settled into silence. Chloe began curling her hair into pretty ringlets, and Penny started dipping her brush into her eyeshadow palette.

"What look are you going for?"

Penny cocked her head in thought, "Honestly I never really go for any look. I just go with the flow and see how it turns out."

"Wow that's amazing. It always turns out bomb," Chloe said with wide eyes.

Penny couldn't help but smile, it was nice to be validated once in a while, "If you want I could do yours."

"Yes! I would love that." Chloe grinned. Grabbing her makeup brushes and palettes, Penny situated herself in front of Chloe. She was naturally beautiful: clear skin, wide doe eyes, and a small nose. Penny couldn't help but think of her own splotchy skin, still dotted with acne scars and occasional breakouts. But she had come to like Chloe. Unlike the girls back in high school, Chloe never pointed out her acne and never made passive aggressive remarks. Sure, most of the time she tagged along with Zoe's group, but Penny didn't mind.

"Can I do a glittery night look?" Penny inquired.

Chloe nodded.

After thirty minutes, glitter dusted Penny's shirt and her fingers were different shades of blue and grey. Standing back to admire her work, she smiled. Chloe looked beautiful. Penny couldn't help but smile in a proud-mama kind of way, and handed her a mirror.

"How is it?"

"Take a look."

Gazing into the mirror, Chloe gaped at her reflection. Her face was now sculpted into an angular form, her brows arched over her eyes, her lips rested in a natural pout, and her eyes — they were breathtaking. Penny had worked her magic — giving her a glittery night look.

"This is good," she paused, "like really good." Chloe looked up at her in awe, and went back to inspecting Penny's work. "You're really good," she murmured again. Penny sheepishly smiled, and rubbed the back of her head. Creating art was when she felt like the best version of herself. The colors just came to her, and for once, she just seemed to know what to do. Nothing else in her life seemed to be as easy.

❋  ❋  ❋

Penny found herself wondering what he would look like at the party. What would he be wearing? Will his eyes be black or brown? What version of him will she see? Chloe slipped her arm through hers as they walked into the room. There was heavy trap music playing in the background, and a sweaty group of guys were playing beer pong close to the entrance. Some girls were body-rolling to the music and swaying around the room, cups in hand. A familiar feeling surged in her body—the familiar feeling of hopelessness. But this time, one thing was different. This time, Penny had a purpose.

"I'll go get us some drinks," she said. Chloe nodded flashing her thumbs up, before joining in with the swaying crowd of people, blending in effortlessly. Penny squeezed her way through the crowds of people, in search for the drinks. Everywhere she looked she saw beautiful girls seated on sofas or leaning on walls. Suddenly she felt very very foolish — who was she trying to fool? Dressed up or not, she was still just Penny. The thought left a bad taste in her mouth, making her all the more desperate to get the drinks and head back. Finally she found the table, and quickly poured two cups before weaving her way through the crowd again. Chugging a big sip, she felt a bit looser and looked over the crowd in search for Chloe.

Suddenly she saw a familiar mop of black hair poking out. Inadvertently, a tide of relief overtook her and she began stumbling across the room to him. James was the perfect remedy to this situation. She could already imagine his quiet head nod and level-headed gaze. She prayed that his self-assurance would rub off on her somehow. God knows she needed it most at this party. Penny began to see the outline of his body in the blue and purple light.

"James!" she called out, about to pat him on the shoulder when ...

When she saw her. His lips were locked with someone and as Penny stepped closer, she could see her face. She was like Chloe. She was like James. And again, Penny felt so stupid. How did she ever think that they shared a shred in common? James was with them and was always with them. He seemed to sense Penny, and met eyes with her. Time seemed to stand still as they looked at each other. He saw the pain and humiliation in her eyes, and she saw the confusion in his. Penny couldn't bare his gaze, and fled, running to the door.

James hadn't promised her anything, and here she was ... hoping for something more.