The Heartbreaker Agreement

Chapter Ten: Beliefs

I lay in Jaxon's bed, music playing around the room from the speakers of his stereo system, and the blankets on his bed covering me completely. I felt completely drained and dirty, as if a thick layer of grime covered my body. It was disgusting, I was disgusting; Jaxon's friendship was ruined because of me and there was nothing I could do.

If I told him that I did it to make him jealous then I'd throw out my innocent card, but if I apologized he'd just blame Erik even more. If Erik told him what I'd done...I'd be throwing out everything. I would no longer be perfect to Jaxon and I'd have to explain myself. If I explained, I'd end up letting something slip or lose Jaxon's attention completely. I wouldn't finish the agreement and when best friends make pacts, they have to be fulfilled.

This agreement was killing me; I'd just destroyed a friendship that resembled the one that Sarah and I held and I was playing a boy's emotions. I was doing exactly what Jaxon did, and although it was following the agreement, it was wrong. I was hurting him and he was to blind on 'you're the one I've been waiting for,' to even notice that I was screwing his life up. I was fighting fire with fire and the only reasons I had to continue was the agreement and Jaimie.

If my reasons could be any more cliché or ridiculous I'd be in a tween magazine.

"Are you hungry?" Jaxon asked, pulling me from my thoughts, and I leaned up to look at him from across the room. His eyes were fully focused on a drawing and his fingers were dirty from the charcoal he was using. He looked so completely lost in his drawing that I wasn't sure he'd even spoken to me. I sat completely up and tucked my legs underneath me to watch him.

His jaw kept clenching and unclenching, but more importantly, his eyes were hard. I could tell that he was angry and that he containing it fairly well, but I felt sympathy for him. I'd been the cause of his pain, but then again if I really wanted to be twisted, I could say he'd brought it on himself.

Jaxon Rhyker was a scumbag. He deliberately stole hearts and virginities just to turn make him seem cool. Maybe he didn't have a daddy figure or he wasn't good with things like emotions but that didn't give him an excuse. And if I wanted to make it worse I could say that he deserved to break completely. Jaxon made every girl hate him; he'd made me kiss his friend. He was the reasons for his own demise.

While half of it might all be true, he wouldn't be this far in if it weren't for someone else. He also wouldn't be this mad, right now, if I hadn't screwed with his friendship.

I stood up for a moment, stretched and walked around the bed to him. My sympathy was enough to keep me from trying anything that would be considered too much, but my disgust toward him was enough to keep me from falling from him and continue my work in the agreement.

Jaxon barely glanced up at me as I walked to stand behind him and placed my hands on his shoulders. I looked at his drawing and gasped at how breathtaking it was. Jaxon's skills were obvious and since it was officially the first time that I'd seen him draw something, I felt honored. The picture itself was simple, but somehow Jaxon's eye for detail made it look alive.

There were two wolves, one of which was bleeding on the ground, whimpering and almost not fighting back, but the second one...it was livid. The posture of the wolf was strange but defensive also. Its teeth were sunk into the other wolf, and its eyes were enraged. It looked as if it was holding nothing back when it came to the other wolf and for a moment I could see nothing more than two wolves but then I stared at its eyes once more and bit my lip.

Jaxon was the larger, more ferocious wolf, and Erik was the runt that had no interest in fighting.

"Are you hungry?" Jaxon asked again as he drew the limp tail of the smaller wolf.