We often feel anxious, in response, to danger or threatening situations. These feelings are there to protect us and usually I would agree that it is normal to feel these things. However, I have been stood outside-in the rain- for nearly an hour now as I try to get my nerves under control because I was invited to this family dinner.
The sound of Aerin's laughter drifts through the open window and it should have been encouraging but it's not. If anything it just makes me feel even more out of place.
Is it too late to turn around and run back to my room? I glance around quickly before shaking my head. No more running away. I promised I'd be here.
Taking a deep breathe, I raise my fist and knock on the deep mahogany door before taking a step back.
Footsteps sound and the door opens to reveal none other than Zeke. He is dressed up in an all-black suit and his hair is messy. Almost as if someone had been running their hands through it, I note silently.
His infamous smirk is present on his face when I look up again. Fuck, he totally just caught me checking him out. Damn pregnancy hormones.
"Aren't you going to invite me in?" I blurt out, hoping that it will distract him from the sad fact that he had caught me staring at him.
"I was just waiting for you to stop drooling" he responds after pushing the door open wider, "come on in".
I push past him, quickly slip my shoes off before beelining towards the dining room- which I thankfully knew my way too as Aerin had rushed me and Alexa there when Alexa had a meltdown by the side of the pool outside the house.
Immediately the smell of Dolma hits me as I push the door open and look around the room. The room is a mixture of monotonous colours with accents of yellow to add some colour. A table, big enough to comfortably sit 10 people, is in the centre of the room with black chairs pushed in. In the corner, a small bar is placed and I notice the yellow roses that had been bundled up and set on the white marble. However, my favourite item in this room was the grand fireplace and the painting above it.
Aerin had painted it her self and it was gorgeous. I was mesmerised by it the first time I came in here and that hadn't changed. Most people might think that it is too inappropriate to have in such a public space but it adds character.
The painting is of a nude women curled up into a ball on her side. Her hair obscures her face but if you look closely you can see that it is supposed to be Aerin.
In a writing so small you can barely see it against the canvas, words such as slut, disappointment, whore, useless are surrounding Aerin.
She had never told me the full extent of her story but bits and pieces had been shared on page 6 and gossip magazines all over the world about her and her parents relationships. They are strict Sunnis Muslims and hated Naz. He hadn't lived up to their expectations as he wasn't religious at all. It probably didn't help that he took Aerin's virginity before they were married and, thanks to Aerin's ex best friend, the parents found out.
"You're finally here! I was just serving up. Sit" Aerin beams, gesturing me to the empty seat next to Zeke.
"I'm sorry I'm late" I sheepishly smile, "Turns out morning sickness isn't only limited to mornings".
Lies are always more believable when mixed with the truth.
"You should have called, I would have made that tea the doctor suggested to try" Aerin frowns, giving me a pointed look causing everyone else to face me.
She was no doubt reminding me of her promise to help me which she had been very resilient with. She had agreed to be my emergency contact and had asked to come to parenting classes with me when she has the time.
"It is no big deal" I shrug after a moment, slouching into my seat. Praying that they will pay attention to something else.
"Of course it is" Aerin scowls, "have you told your family yet? Or the baby daddy at least?"
"I already told you that I'm not doing that" I shrug, trying not to seem bothered by the questioning and instead glancing around the room in a weak attempt to avoid eye contact.
"Why not? Are you scared? Or maybe you already have and he didn't want anything to do with it? Is that it, baby?" Taunts Zeke, nudging my shoulder with his own easily because of our close proximity.
Shit. He is way too close to me right now and I clench my fists under the table in an attempt not to just punch (or kiss) his stupidly attractive face.
"Habibi, I asked you a question" he prods and I lose any patience I might have had. Before either of us can process what I'm doing, my hand is on his cheek and I'm pushing his head away.
"You should learn to mind your own business" I snap, jumping to my feet before he could react, "I have to go. I'm sorry".
I don't give anyone a chance to tell me off for disrespecting Zeke as I am out of the door as soon as the words leave my mouth.
Fuck my stupidity. Fuck my luck. Fuck my job. Most importantly fuck Zeke Dagher.
He knows how close I am with my own father and how much this must effect me knowing that my child won't have that. He knows that I fear very little and there must be a fucking good reason that I wasn't telling the baby daddy. Yet he still felt the need to tease me about it.
The concrete burns the underside of my feet as I run down the winding driveway that separates the house from the resort but I force myself to keep moving as Zekes shouts for me to come back follow me.
Dio mio. Why did I think that it was even a good idea to go to that stupid dinner? I knew Zeke would be there and I am well aware of the dynamics of our relationship. I'm also aware that I'm emotional and hormonal and couldn't handle his shit today.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why was I so stupid?
His shouts fade into the sea crashing against the sand by the time I finally let myself fall to my knees on the soft sand.
I wouldn't cry about this but I can't help the surge of emotions that overwhelm me as I stare out to sea as if I could see Tunisia over the waves.
The idea of getting on the next boat crosses my mind. Tunisia is a beautiful place and I hadn't been there in years so it would be safe. I could dye my hair, get some new contacts and get fake identification by tomorrow.
Granted I would need to leave all my clothes here. As a safety measure, if Zeke knew I was leaving he would go running to Aerin. She wouldn't let me leave in the state I'm in.
I'm sure I could find some underground place to hide away for a day or two but if I could find it so could Zeke.
Shit.
I quickly shake my head, as if that would help me forget that I even thought of leaving again, as I realise what I was really going to do. Zeke making one stupid comment was not a reason to break my promise to Aerin. I had promised not to run and I meant it.
YOU ARE READING
Precious Sins
Romance"You act like you're indestructible, but you're not". "Guess you'd know best, huh?" - - - Elisia regina Thomas had a hard life growing up. Always in the spotlight because of her family but no one really knew her. She was just seen as another spoil...
