"...you hold all my secrets and you are the one thing that can destroy me if you choose to." -Kim Seokjin
He spent his entire life doing what he was told to uphold the family name, but when one decision could make a lasting impression on his reputa...
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Dinner was exceptional, but I expected nothing less from Hobi. It was comforting, and though he and Jungkook were trying their best to create something with Taehyung, I enjoyed their company. I was happy knowing I had my friends with me. Taehyung gathered some dishes from the table and stood up to take them to the kitchen. I scooted next to Jungkook since he was the closest and leaned my head onto his shoulder, wrapping my arms around him. I wanted to cry and let loose all over his shoulder, but I didn't and held it in, just like the secret I held about Seokjin.
Seokjin, the thought of him sparked a dust of a tear in the corner of my eye. I squeezed my eyes tight and whispered a silent prayer.
The doorbell of my apartment sounded. I glanced at the clock on my wall, wondering who it could be at this hour. Perhaps Jimin? Would Jimin really fly back here because of what happened? The gesture would be nice but unnecessary.
I didn't even lift from Jungkook to see who got up to answer, and the sound of sadness drowned out any noise around me. I felt the small circles Jungkook drew on my arm until I realized; he wasn't drawing circles; he was writing my name.
"Jin, what are you doing here?"
My breath hitched.
Hobi's voice was firm and distinct. I replayed the question over and over in my head. He's here. He's really here. I didn't want to move-part of the reason I drifted off while resting on his shoulder. Perhaps I was dreaming because I wanted to talk to him and see him. I told myself it wasn't real.
"Are you drunk?" Hobi's voice spoke again.
"Not as much as I should be." Was the response.
A light tapping on my hand signaled to my brain-the whisper of my name followed by my friend, who was my comfort. "River," Jungkook called again. My eyes opened, and I lifted slowly from him while hearing the small chatter in the background. Jungkook's eyes searched mine as if he was looking for confirmation of something. His brows knitted-but I shook my head slightly and turned to the visitor in my home. He talked to Hobi, and created an audience between Jungkook, Taehyung, and I. Taehyung glanced at me-his eyes held countless thoughts in them, squinting as if he confirmed as well. This can't bode well.
"Sorry for your loss, Jin," Hobi spoke. Seokjin nodded at him until his gaze fell to mine. Seokjin nodded and stuck his hands in the pockets of his slacks.
I stood from Jungkook and walked over to them, keeping a distance from Jungkook, but staying close to Hobi. Seokjin stared at me, eyes crimson stained and puffed. His long trench coat hung neatly on his tall frame, but the top button of his collared navy blue shirt was left undone. He was beautiful, hurt, broken, but remained a pleasure for the eyes. "What are you doing here?" I asked, voice shaky and low.
"I needed to see you, but I didn't think-" His stare averted to Jungkook and then to Taehyung, who witnessed the scene from the kitchen. "-you would have company." He continued. I didn't speak. I only stared at him, hoping to communicate he wasn't the only one hurt. Did he expect me to forget the cold and empty text message he sent me or the way he ignored me? "I'll leave." He spoke in reverence to my silence.
It's obvious he didn't want to be alone, but I would not kick my friends out who made the sweet gesture of being with me during this time. I know Mrs. Kim wasn't my family, but she felt like it, and now her family he's seeking comfort. What kind of person would I be, sending him away in this state? "No, you can stay. Make yourself at home. Would you like something to eat?" I offered.
"Just some water would be nice." He answered.
I walked over to the kitchen, hearing Hobi and Seokjin talking as they sat on the couch. Taehyung remained in the kitchen, stepping aside for me to open the fridge. A tension surrounded us. I peered up at him; his gaze lowered as if he couldn't face me. Great, he's upset from an assumption. I probably couldn't deny it if asked. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and closed it back. Taehyung rested his hand on my arm, stopping me from proceeding. "Are you seeing him?" He asked.
It was a loaded question. Technically, I wasn't seeing him, but more like sleeping with him. I would never admit this. "We aren't dating if that's what you're asking," I answered.
Taehyung glanced through the open window of my kitchen toward the living room. His stare narrowed before finding mine again. "Seems like he wants more," Taehyung mumbled.
There wasn't any response that wouldn't paint me as the mistress I've become for Seokjin. However, Taehyung was wrong in his assessment. Seokjin only wanted a moment to escape his pain before facing reality again. Nothing could grow from this. I exited the kitchen from Taehyung and over into the living room, handing Seokjin the bottle of water, and he mumbled thanks. I could have taken the seat next to him, but I opted for the seat next to Jungkook.
"You told him where you lived?" Jungkook whispered in my ear low enough I barely heard him. I shook my head and kept my gaze on TV as the next movie began. "Then why the hell is he here? What is going on with you two, River?" He pressed. I exhaled loudly, noticing how Taehyung watched me when he took a seat in the armchair.
"Watch the movie JK." I retorted and leaned on his shoulder to silence any more questions.
