Un-Kingly Rule

Introduction

Hello, you don't know me. You probably never will. We'll never sit and have a conversation and get to know one another. We'll never fall in love or have a story. We'll never be anything more than writer and reader. As a reader, you probably picked this story up because you thought you'd give it a try.

"What the hell? Why not?"

Something like that, right? That's okay. Truth be told, I don't know why I'm writing this. It's not like I'm some miracle man or fantastically fascinating person. I won't ever cure cancer, or explore Venus or anything. No, I'm your typical shut in who has too much time on his hands, can't forget quite a bit of things, and most importantly—can't let go.

I guess the appropriate way to start this would be to talk about me a bit. You already know that I'm a shut in. I'm 100% introverted. Going to new places is only fun when I want to. Not when others tell me I need to. I'm stubborn. I'm obnoxious at times. I'm sarcastic, awkward, and the thing that everyone who knows me would tell you; I'm an asshole.

It's weird, isn't it? The list of things I've been told I am are all such bad things in the eyes of many. So, with a list of bad things already stacked against me, why in the world would anyone want me in their life? I mean, being an asshole alone is enough to warrant people not wanting to associate with you, but add in the sarcasm and obnoxious stubbornness, woo. You've got yourself a recipe for someone who sounds undesirable.

I, however, think that I'm much more than those things. I'll admit I am all the things' people say I am, no problem. I mean, in the words of famous musician Marshal Mathers "I am whatever you say I am, if I wasn't, then why would I say I am?"

I see myself as intricate. I like patterns almost to a fault, (which becomes a major problem in my life...but more on that later.) I like complex music where the lyrics can be interpreted differently, and I like books that aren't fact. I live in a world of so-called facts, I rather not read about them too. I love writing more than I love reading. I like everything from the MCU and the animated DC universe. My all-time favorite book is The Outsiders by S.E Hinton, and my favorite movie is The Crow (Rest in Peace Brandon Lee, and by extension Bruce Lee.) I'm a nerdy kid who grew up wanting to be Spider-Man more than Superman, I don't know when to shut my mouth, and I often times spend most of my day in my own head. I guess the main thing that I am is...different. I'm not like most people. Even the people I know tell me that I'm not someone that should ever be duplicated. Whether because I'm super unique and one of a kind, or because I'm the literal devil to them...uh, that remains to be seen.

By this point, you're probably wondering; "What the fuck's this dude talking about?" and I apologize. Like I said, I don't know when to shut up, and that is also true when I write. I can't help myself. I get an idea in my head and then, if I like the idea, I can't stop thinking or talking about it until I make it happen. That's what this story is. It's a story about every girl I've ever dated.

Que awkward silence.

Yes, I decided to write a story about every girl I've ever had a relationship with. Recently, my girlfriend broke up with me. Whilst, I understand, and she has a whole section later just for her, it doesn't change that it made me think that there has to be something wrong with me. I'm defective or broken or maybe I'm just not cut out to be around other people.

My hope is that by writing this story, this collection of women who came into my life and left just as arrogantly, will give me some clarity. Maybe it'll help me understand why people always leave in the end. Maybe it'll help you understand something about you too. Perhaps you will read about a girl (or guy if that's your thing) in this story that you once knew, or once dated, or wished you dated. Maybe together, as writer and reader, we can figure out where our faults screw us over, or if it was our fault to begin with.