❝I don't want just words anymore. So if that's all you have for me, then you'd better just go.❞
𝕆ℝ
In which, Gianna Roberts finds love unexpectedly and with the strangest of people.
((Mikaelsons X OC))
Cover by @lokiaffaire
•I don't want just words anymore. So if that's all you have for me then you'd better just go•
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
TRIGGER WARNING: Briefly talks about sexual abuse, and suicidal thoughts. There is also some language. Please read safely and cautiously.
➰ ➰ ➰
When Gianna opens her eyes, her mother is the last person she expects to see. Sarelle only stares at the wall next to her daughter's head, thinking about whatever else she could be doing right in this moment.
As Gianna reaches for the cup of water next to her bed, Sarelle rolls her eyes and tuts disapprovingly. Nonetheless, the older women helps her daughter take the drink she so desperately craved. Once they're both settled back down again, they go back to being silent. The awkwardness becomes almost unbearable, and Gianna wishes she could just cut the tension with a large pair of scissors. And it's not until Gianna meets her eyes, that Sarelle allows her daughter an explanation for her presence.
"I'm only here because you still have me as your emergency contact. The hospital called me so you wouldn't wake up alone." Gianna frowns, suddenly nauseous at the thought of her brother and sister leaving her alone. But did she really expect them to stay with her after everything she's done?
"You, uh.. you can go now." Gianna looks away from her mother's judgmental eyes. "Seriously, I'm all good. Thanks for stopping by."
"Don't be so silly, you need me. Just like you've always needed me. I'm your mother, you could be a little more grateful, darling." At the thought of herself actually thanking her mother, Gianna scoffs. Sarelle glares in return, wishing her daughter would stop being so irritatingly stubborn . "Do you really think people will actually careif you die? Honestly, Gianna, don't be so stupid."
Gianna glares at her mother, becoming more sad at her mother's words than angry. "How can you say that? And I don't need you, I haven't needed you since I was six."
"Then tell me, dearest Gianna... If you don't need me then why are you crying at the thought of me leaving?" For a moment, Sarelle's face remains impassive, but as more tears well up in Gianna's eyes, a small smirk appears on her face.
"I'm not crying because of you; you're not worth it. I'm crying because my delusion of who were, has been utterly shattered by the truth of who you are." Tears pour from Gianna's eyes without any change in her facial expression.
The worst type of crying isn't the kind that everyone can see– the wailing on street corners, the tearing at clothes. No, the worst kind is when your soul weeps, and no matter what you do, there's no way to comfort it. A section withers and becomes a deepening scar on the part of your soul that has survived. Gianna's soul contains more scar tissue than it contains life. It's pure pain and pure surrender, and her soul cries without any fight from her body. And that's how you know she's painfully, deeply affected.
"This is your life now, darling. Don't let it go to waste." Sarelle sneers at her daughter, angry that she still continues to hold a grudge. The things that happened to Gianna occurred years ago, and Sarelle doesn't understand why she can't just get over it. "Was being your father's little slut, and destroying my marriage not enough–"
"I was six years old! I wasn't old enough to understand what was happening. And you would just sit there on the couch, wasted as usual, as he'd take advantage of me. You just sat there, watching as my father, your husband, raped me! And since then, you've done nothing but blame me for it. Like I'm responsible for a grown man not being able to keep his hands off a child. Your child!" Gianna's voice cracks, the pain of the past hitting her full force. "And when I finally decided to speak up about what he was doing, you took his side and just blamed me for everything. You played it off as my wanting attention, made me pretend it never happened. But the silence was killing me. And that's all that there ever was, it was all I ever knew. Keep quiet, pretend nothing had happened, that nothing was wrong... And look how well that turned out! You made a little girl so afraid of living, that she grew up thinking the only solution is to die. You've made me stay as the same scared little girl my entire life. And I'm starting to believe that I'll never amount to anything, or be good enough for anyone. So you can say that this is my life now, but it's been my life for the past seventeen years."
After hearing raised voices, Treyton and Stefan come running into the room. There's a group of people with them, but neither women pays them any mind. Gianna is finally letting everything out, and Sarelle is just too angry and full of vengeance to care about the things she's saying.
"I've never needed you. Not then, and certainly not now." A sharp 'slap' resonates throughout the room. The group of people in the room flinch at the sight of Sarelle's hand against her daughter cheek. But Gianna and her mother just continues to glare at each other. Treyton decides to step in, and he's quick to pull the older women out of her chair.
"Get out! Leave! We don't want you here." Sarelle stares at her son, shocked that he's the one standing up to her. He's never taken Gianna side before, not until very recently. And it's a very tough pill to swallow for the eldest Roberts.
Sarelle finally leaves the room, but not before saying one last thing to Gianna. "You deserve everything you got."
The vampires become confused at the statement, but Treyton seems to stiffen into a board. His hands tighten into fists as he watches Gianna's face carefully. She looks on the verge of tears, like it's taking everything inside of her not to cry. Stefan notices this too and walks to her side, and along with Treyton, they holds her. And for the smallest of moments, all everyone hears is total silence. It's that totally silent part of a cry, that announces that the most horrible grief is going to follow. Then it does, and she's muffling it. But the vampires can hear it and they flinch painfully. It hurts so deeply, that they almost want someone to come over and jab her with a sedative. Because it's pitch pierces their souls, and her cries tear at their hearts.
Weeping is not the same thing as crying. It takes your whole body to weep, and when it's over, you feel like you don't have any bones left to hold you up. But when someone cries so hard that it hurts their throat, it is out of devastation. It's knowing that no matter what you do or attempt to do, can change the situation. When you feel like you need to cry, when you want to just get it out, relieve some of the pressure from the inside– that is true pain. Because no matter how hard you try or how bad you want to, you can't. That pain just stays in place. Then, if you are lucky, one small tear may escape from those eyes that water constantly. That one tear– that tiny, salty, droplet of moisture is a means of escape. Although it's a small tear, it is the heaviest thing in the world. Because then it becomes a waterfall, and it doesn't do a damn thing to fix anything.
Gianna Elodie Grace, is painfully and unmistakably broken.
