Wild Magic Four: The Light Beyond Constellations- a M/M fantasy romance

8- The Coastal Inn

GRIFFIN—

When the innkeeper brought us two bowls filled with a chunky meat and potato stew, a tankard of ale with two mugs, and a loaf of fresh, warm bread, both my and River's stomachs' grumbled and the man laughed aloud.

"I'll bring ye seconds once yer almost done with those," he barked with a smirk.

"Thank you," River replied with a sweet smile up at the man. The innkeeper froze, studying River, and then he returned the smile before whirling around and leaving us alone again. The expression on the gruff, ugly man was almost... sweet. And it had me remembering that that was the reaction everyone had when meeting my mate. He was goodness incarnate, sweet and light and airy. He was almost innocent in his sweetness, and I was... I was his opposite in every way. Where he was kind, I was gruff and rude. Where he was sweet, I was brusque. Where he laughed, I scowled. Where he made friends, I saw only enemies.

I could remember him, talking and laughing and joking, even with me. Even when I could only awkwardly stare as he laughed at a joke he himself had made, he still chattered away without stop. He was never-endingly happy, and now, looking at him, smiling at the innkeeper but with an expression that didn't reach his eyes, my chest clenched at how I had ruined the man who had been nothing but kind to me.

He had been nothing but sweet, an angel, just like I'd always called him, and I'd torn his life apart.

I hadn't heard him speak more than a few words at a time in hours, gods, since I'd fucked him in the cabin, and before now I couldn't point to a time when he'd been quiet more than a few minutes.

"You've been quiet," I mumbled, meeting his eyes as he looked up from his bowl. There was something there— surprise, maybe? or happiness at my talking to him?— but almost immediately that turned into rage. Something I was becoming far too used to seeing on his face. "Normally, you just.. You talk a lot. But you've been—"

"Are you kidding me?" he scoffed, his eyes widening in disbelief and hatred. Goddess, he hated me so much. He slammed his hands on the table, jostling the silverware and bowls so they loudly clanged. I glanced over, but luckily the innkeeper was in the kitchen or elsewhere, and didn't come running out, so I turned back to River's stormcloud expression.

I'd known the words were idiotic before they'd even left my mouth, but somehow I hadn't... I wanted my angel back, and the stupidity had left my lips before I'd been able to hold it back.

"What the hell do you want from me, Griffin?" he bit out, his eyes on fire. Goddess, why the hell had I said anything? What had I been thinking, taunting him about his pain? Why hadn't I just let him be silent?

Because you want him happy. He's your mate, and he's miserable. You want him happy and chatting and laughing.

I bit back the urge to growl at my own inner voice, and held my hands up to River, trying to calm him down as he exploded from my insensitive words.

"How can I be the man I was," he finished with a leer, "when you fucking killed him? I'm never going to be him again, Griffin. The man who fell in love with you was an idiot, and you killed him. So—"

"— Don't... Don't say that," I murmured under my breath, my voice pathetically quiet even in my own ears. "Please, River, you don't understand. I didn't..."

"You didn't, what, Griffin? You didn't mean to trick me? You didn't mean for me to fall in love with you? You didn't what, Griffin?"

Goddess, he was so angry. So bitter. I had done that. I had...

Would he really heal, be able to go back to his life before, like I had been hoping? Or was my supposed betrayal truly the thing that changed him from his very soul?