infatuation

XXV

(not proofread)
[ chapter 25 ]

may 20
5:00 p.m
miami, florida

- - - - -

Everyone was here.

Ariana (of course), Zayn, Billie, Victoria, Courtney, Alexa, Doug, and me. Including all of our families. I was holding back tears as we got closer and closer to where only Ariana and her family could continue.

We were at Miami's main airport, Ariana's hand interlaced tightly with mine as she was attached to my hip. It was the day. The day that Ariana and her family moved to Los Angeles, California for only God knows how long.

Even just remembering that was indeed the reality of the situation, my heart clenched painfully. This was more than sadness, I felt true pain. Like I'm being stabbed in the heart repeatedly and there's nothing I can do about it.

I looked down at Ariana's natural curls, flowing down a little pass her shoulders with perfection. She was makeup-free, and still so effortlessly beautiful. I watched the people rush by, barely sparing a glance at the angel walking before them.

Were they blind? Or simply unable to comprehend the true ethereal woman who walked with power and talked with assertiveness? Even in the saddest times, she was determined. Her dominance came off of her in waves that could make you addicted with ease.

even though behind closed doors, she was very submissive

Not the time, dumbass.

I was sad, but I was proud. She was chasing her dreams. She was strong enough to take that big step, and I knew she could make it. She had the talent, looks, skills, she had it all. Ariana Grande-Butera has it all, and she always will.

Everything but me.

Well, honestly if I wasn't so pussy to do things on my own, it'd be the other way around. Because at the end of the day, I was the one losing her. She could gain somebody better, I knew I couldn't. Even if I tried.

though, i had no plans to

"Alright, I guess it's time for the final goodbyes." I didn't notice we were already at the gate only they could pass through. I said goodbye to Ariana's parents and brother first. Ariana had something much deeper that we needed to talk about.

We needed to decide if this was an 'I'll call you later' or a goodbye.

When the time came and Ariana finished her goodbyes with everyone else, I brought her further away from earshot of the others.

Her smile was tight, nervous, and unbelievably sad. The look in her eyes only broke me more.

"So, are we going to finish this now or slowly kill ourselves until the feelings fade?" I began, trying to put at least a little light into this dark situation.

A breathy, short chuckle escaped her bare, pouty lips. "I guess the best choice in this situation is the easy way out, huh." She sighed. I took a deep breath, eyes squeezed shut, and nodded slowly.

"I'm gonna miss you so f-fucking much, moonlight." I couldn't keep my emotions back anymore. My voice cracked mid-sentence, tears flowing down my face without me even audibly crying. There was no way I could control it.

"I'm gonna miss you too, Y/nn." She took a deep breath, her watery eyes dropping to her feet. I wrapped my arms around her neck and softly pushed her into me.

That's when she broke down.

Her sobs and sorrow-filled cries muffled into one of the only hoodies I had left- as Ariana took most of them. I held her tightly, leaning my chin on top of her head; tangled up in her curls.

She tightened her grip, which was wrapped around my waist, holding onto my hoodie with all she had.

When her cries subsided and my tears dried up, we pulled away. I glanced up, noticing we only had a few minutes left to say goodbye. I then glanced at the rest of them, who were watching us with sadness and sympathy.

"I love you."

"I love you."

We left it at that, and she quickly grabbed my cheeks; pulling me into the most emotional kiss we've ever had. I put everything I had into it, hoping she felt the deep emotion I did. I could tell she was attempting the same thing.

i felt it. i was feeling it all.

I left a lingering kiss on her forehead, and then we completely pulled away.

"You've made these past few months ones I'll never forget. The memories we've made, I'll always remember. I will always remember you, Y/n Y/m/n Y/l/n. Always. I'll text and call as often as I can, but I know we both need our time before we should be talking again. Try to get these feelings to fade-" Her voice cracked at the end.

She took a deep breath, as I did the same. I wasn't ready. But I needed to be.

"I'll always remember us." She breathed out. I smiled lightly.

I gave her another kiss, then one to the cheek, and then one just at her hairline.

"I love you, Ariana. I'll always remember you. All of you. All of us." I kissed her forehead and pulled away completely, again.

"It's time to go!" Ariana's parents called for us as they were glancing at the clock. I sighed, grabbing the brunette's hand and walking back over. I wiped my eyes as I had to let Ariana's hand go so she could pick her luggage up.

"Goodbye, Y/n." She gave me one last kiss and began walking backwards behind her parents. She was waving goodbye to everyone else when her eyes connected with mine again.

"Goodbye, Ariana."

_____________________

ATTENTION: ALL MUST READ

this is NOT the end of the book . we still have 4 (short) chapters to go . it is VITAL you guys read the following chapters in order to understand the SEQUEL . yes, there will be a sequel to this story, one with a better ending between you and ariana .

IM RELEASING ALL THE NEXT CHAPTERS AT ONCE, as they will be fairly short .

thank you all SO much for the support , it makes me so happy you don't even know 😭 . much love, A