XIX

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Ashley:

We found another neighborhood that had long been abandoned, and had only a sparse spread of infected. We split up into two groups to cover more area quicker. Mitch and I searched one side of the street whilst Dan and Sydney searched the other. At this point, we were all somewhat professional scavengers and it wasn’t even twenty minutes before a rumble of an engine penetrated the air. We converged at the neighborhood’s entrance, and Dan and Sydney were waiting for us there in a running SUV. “That was quick. I thought we’d be here for hours.” Mitch said, as we slid into the back of the car. Nobody replied. None of us wanted to speak, because our throats and eyes burned from the crying. Sydney insisted on driving, but Dan refused to give up the driver’s position. “Last time you were driving, you wrecked my car, gave me a concussion in the process, and killed a family.” She snarled coldly. “That’s a pretty good reason to not let him drive.” I whispered modeless to myself, but Mitch picked up on my words. “Dan, let me drive, just to keep the peace.” Mitch suggested. Sydney didn’t deny his suggestion, so Dan agreed to it. We switched seats in the car so that I sat by Mitch in the front, and Sydney and Dan could work out there problems in the back. There was a strong sense of unity but also  separation between us. Mitch and I seems to act as one unit and Sydney and Dan seemed to act as another. It felt terribly solemn in the car. It lacked Jerome’s humorous laugh and Louise’s quiet statements. The road ahead of us was long, but with the increasing number of zombies and the decreasing number of survivors, we met very little human related trouble. Dan and Sydney couldn’t seem to work out their troubles, and Sydney eventually turned away to try to sleep it away. Dan sighed, but didn’t say anything until she was definitely asleep. “Is that true, what she said? With the whole car accident? You killed a family?” I asked. “Do we need to bring it up now? We’ve all dealt with enough death today.” He grumbled. “Yeah, sorry. I didn’t think before I spoke, I guess.” I replied. There was a long pause, but then Dan spoke again. “If we ever get out of  this hellhole, I’m never going to forget it. Because of me, a whole family is dead. I just… what if I killed Sydney too? Or even Mark? I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. She warned me, Sydney did, to slow down or pull over, but I ignored her. I’ve ruined her life, and mine too.” He rambled, distressed. “You didn’t ruin her life, Dan. The zombie apocalypse did.” Mitch replied, in a poor attempt to comfort him. “Yeah, Dan. I’ll be honest, it may haunt you for years even after we escape. But someday, you’ll be able to turn, and look back, and say, ‘I made the right decisions. I got Sydney and I out alive.’ And then, everything will be okay.” I said, smiling comfortingly at him. He looked at me with something like disagreement. “You seem awfully confident that we’re going to get out alive.”  He said, glancing at Sydney, then back to me. “I know we’re gonna get out. If we’ve made it this far, there’s literally nothing that can stop us now.” Mitch chimed in. “Together,” He continued. “We can do anything.” As he said the last four words, he looked at me, and smiled genuinely. The world seemed to be full of genuine tears and false smiles, and it was a rarity to see a genuine smile. I think he was about to say something else, but Sydney, who must have either just woken up or had faking sleep sat up. “Keep your eyes on the road Mitch!” She grumbled. “We don’t have time for romance right now. We just need to get to Seattle.” As much as her interruption annoyed me, I remembered the tragedies she had also experienced, and my anger turned to sympathy, as we drove on, now in silence. 

Sydney:

I didn’t feel like myself anymore. And I would never feel the same way again. I would never be the same cheerful girl I was, making silly videos for some site. What was it called? Youtube? I couldn’t even remember it. Life before the outbreak felt like a dream really. It was nearly impossible to remember the details, but there were still traces of it in your mind. I missed my old happy go lucky self, but I knew that I’d never see her again, and that hurt me worse than anything. After snapping at Mitch, I could feel a wave of hot dislike flood me, but nobody said anything. To them, the whole world was just delusion. They had yet to actually grasp the situation, and understand what was really happening. They were still living in their dream.  “I thought you were asleep.” Dan said, looking at me softly. “I was. Some bump in the road woke me up.” I replied. “I didn’t feel it.” He said, tilting his head to the side. I didn’t reply, because I didn’t want to play twenty questions with him. “Sydney. What’s wrong? we can work it out. You’re acting different.” Dan stated the obvious. I bit my lip for a moment, filtering out all the anger I felt toward that question. “I experienced something life changing. My best friend died next to be in a battle. I saw Gardenwall fall, and we ran like cowards. People have been slaughtered before us all, we’ve encountered the undead, and seen betrayal in it’s finest form, but you all don’t seem to understand what’s going on. Why can’t you see the world we’re living in?” I explained. distraught. Dan looked into my eyes with the utmost sympathy like he understood what I felt like, but couldn’t feel it himself. I hugged him tightly, but held in the tears. Mitch and Ashley didn’t understand, but I didn’t expect them to. I liked them, and they were my friends, but they would never understand me on the level that Dan and Mark did. The road trip continued, but it became a little less painful, when I was in someone’s arms, warm, and with a false sense of safety. We crossed the state border into the edge of Washington hours later, and were met with an unfamiliar sight. It was group of oddly familiar looking people trying to change a tire. 

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