There's a Reason Horror Movies are Rated R

The Type of Horror Movies with Horrible Crossovers

Six knocks at the door. Not three. Six.

"Cali, it's your exterminator. Answer the fucking door," Freddy groaned from his bedroom. I sleepily opened my eyes and checked the time on my phone. It was 10 at night.

"Just a second..." I muttered and forced myself off the couch. I dragged myself to the door and flung it open.

"Hello, mam. You were the apartment that called for an exterminator?" The man was a bit hillbilly looking, with a old, dirtied tee and hat, and a slight beer gut. He was holding a dark green duffle bag and had a blue hospital mask thing on. I could see the word cheap written all over him.

"Uh, yeah, hi. You're pretty early." I smiled and step beside the door. "Please, come in."

"I apologize about the hour, but I'm 'bout to be leavin' the state soon and didn't wanna leave you hangin'." He stepped inside and I lead him to the kitchen.

"No, it's fine, really." I looked at the kitchen table, where 12 beer bottles and McDonald's wrappers were laying all of the table. I sighed and quickly cleaned them up.

"So, you said the problem was cockroaches?" The man asked and sat his bag down on the floor.

"Yeah, and bugs I don't even really know what they are. There's a lot of bugs here, that's all I know," I got ready to pick up the last beer bottle and paused, then turned to him. "You said your name was Bobby, right?"

"Yes, ma'am...." He answered in slightly confused tone. I began to panic, praying he wasn't onto the plan.

"Um, is something wrong?" I threw away the last bottle and turned to him.

"Oh, nothing. Just tryin' to, erm, figure out how I'm going to get rid of these bugs," he responded a bit quickly. Okay, this guy was acting weird.

I smile and nodded. If he was going to play this game, I would, too. I could not ruin this plan.

He zipped open his bag and rummaged through it, obviously looking for something. After a few seconds, he pulled out a weird plastic device.

"What is that?" I asked.

"This here is a fogger. It'll have them pest gone before ya know it," He responded and plugged in the machine. Then it hit me that I'm suppose to be human.

"I don't need to get out of the house or anything, right?" I pulled the fridge open and grabbed a water.

"Nope." He flipped on the machine and smoke, or fog, whatever it was started pouring out of it. He took a step away from it and let it do its magic, while I tried my best to find the couch. When I did I plopped down on it and shut my eyes.

When I opened then again, I automatically heard three men arguing. The only one I recognized, though, was Bobby's.

"I can't believe you killed her!" One of the voices said.

"Better safe then sorry," Bobby argued.

"The reason we do what we do is to save people, not kill them to make sure their not one of them. You couldn't 'accidentally' spill holy water on her or something?"

"Look boys, we can't save everyone."

"You're right, but this one didn't need saving until you killed her!"

Were they talking about me? I sat up and looked at them. "Um, are you guys okay?"

They all stopped and turned to me. "Yeah, we're fine," One of the boys said. "Are you?"

I nodded. "Besides the fact I'm hungry and could use some wine."

"Couldn't we all." He smiled a smile that always meant, "I'm cool, fuck me."

"Right." I paused. How was I going to kill all three of them by myself?

"So, tell me, dear." Bobby turned to me. "Why is a demon livin' in a dump like this?"

I froze. "I, um... I have no where else to go. How did you know?"

"A human would've died in that fog. And I never told you my name but you automatically knew it." Bobby pulled out s knife.

"Wow, you're going to stab me with a knife? You three Supernatural hotshots gonna kill me? Good luck." I groaned and fell back onto the couch.

"This isn't a regular knife, Honey. It can send demons back to hell," The one I sensed was named Dean Winchester said.

"Oh, I'm so scared." I pulled out my phone and started scrolling through iFunny, showing them I wasn't interested.

"Fine, have it your way." Dean came over and stabbed me in the throat with the knife. I wiped my phone screen on my pants and kept scrolling. All three of the stared at me in horror.

"She can't be a demon." Sam Winchester. Too cute.

"Well, I am. And I can't go to hell, I've tried. Trust me, if I could find a way to die I'd do it without hesitation," I grabbed the knife out of my throat and handed it back to Dean. "So, please tell me that fogger actually worked."

"Yeah, it works. Too bad you won't be around to see it." I suddenly felt a jolt in my stomach.

"You fuckers!" I screamed in agony. They all seemed to get a look of relief. "You ruined my shirt!"

"OH, COME ON!" Dean hollered and ran towards me. I ignored him and ran a finger across where he stabbed me. He pounced on me and grabbed me by my hair. "There has to be a way to kill you."

I shrugged. "If you wanna find a way, be my guest." A grin grew across my face. "But you know, if you're going to grab my hair and look sexy, you can't expect me to not do anything." I shoved him off me.

"We can't just leave her here, Bobby. She's going to kill more!" I ignored them and rolled over on the couch.

"Okay, while you figure that out, I still have a few hours of sleep before the boys kick me off the couch." I shut my eyes, both opened them quickly when I felt two arms slide under me and lift me up. "HEY WHAT THE HELL!"

"It's our only choice. We have to find out what you are." Sam tightened his grip with my every squirm.

"NO! I want to sleep." I sat there for a minute, then looked towards Ghostface's door.

"It doesn't matter what yo"-

"WHAT'S THIS? MICHAEL'S DIARY?" I yelled as loud as possible.

"What are you talking ab"-

"GIVE IT TO ME!" Ghostface burst in the room and within seconds had grab me, thrown me on the couch, and in my face. "WHERE?!"

"Is that Scream?" Sam asked. Ghostface and I both paused. Okay, they were about to get there asses whooped. Not to mention the other three just walked in.

"This has to be a joke." Dean crossed his arms. Yeah, but joke was on him.

"You're the only fucking joke in this joint!" Freddy grabbed Dean, and I mean he PICKED HIM UP, carried him outside, and threw him off the balcony. Jason was in the process of trying to stab Bobby, but was leading him towards the door, and Ghostface was fangirling over Sam. Michael took a seat next to me and we were quiet for a minute. Then I burst out laughing at the show going down before me. No pun intended, it had hit me just then they were on a T.V. series. Finally, Bobby gave up trying to harm Jason, grabbed Sam, and dragged him out with him.

"So," I said when all the boys were settled onto the couch. "Who's going to sweep up all the dead bugs?"