Skylar Strife: Facts, Questions, and Scenarios

Incorrect Quotes

A/N: So, this is something new that I thought about trying since I do find Incorrect Quotes to be quite hilarious. Some of these will be centered around a specific AU or even an idea I have that I haven't quite written out yet. There's quite a lot that I already have written down on a Word Document and I might not post them all, so if you want a part two to this, then let me know. I found most of the quotes from Tumblr, Twitter, Pinterest, or Google Images. Also, please note that this is just for fun and is kind of more for me and my own personal enjoyment.

[One]
Law: Do you know how many bones the human body has? It's 206. You start with 369 when you're babies, but they fuse. Wouldn't you want to go back? Have as many bones as a baby? What if I could help you?
Skylar: Hi, yeah, what the actual, literal, GENUINE fuck does this mean? 

[Two]
Skylar: Did you hear about that guy that was paralyzed after eating 413 chicken nuggets?
Luffy: [Cracking his knuckles] So the limit is 412.

[Three]
Luffy: [About Law's plan] This plan seems complicated.
Skylar: To be fair, you also once said that about an orange.
Luffy: They don't make any sense! Apples, you eat their clothes, but oranges, you don't?

[Four]
[Detective Loomes!AU]
Random Killer: How did you find me?
Usotson: With the combined efforts of tracking your DNA prints from crime scenes and eyewitness accounts, we—
Skylar: We put "bitch" into the GPS and it got us here.

[Five]
Skylar: Hey, do you think you could carry this box? It's pretty heavy.
Law: [Picking it up effortlessly] Nothing is heavier than the weight of my sins.
Skylar: Hm. Now I'm equally impressed and distressed. 

[Six]
Skylar: What are you doing?
Luffy: [Spreading toothpaste on toast] Multi-tasking.

[Seven]
[Under the Same Roof!AU]
Skylar: [About a spider she saw] Zoro, get that hideous thing out of the living room, would you?
Zoro: Sanji, Skylar wants you out of the house. 

[Eight]
Luffy: I think we should have glowstick juice injected in our bones when we're born, so if we break 'em there's a fun little surprise
Usopp: What's the surprise?
Skylar: Blood poisoning

[Nine]
Zoro: [Carries all the groceries on both arms]
Skylar: [Reaches out to help]
Zoro: [Switches all groceries to one arm to hold Skylar's hand]
Skylar: That's not what I—okay. 

[Ten]
Skylar: Candid pics? No, take cryptid pics of me.
Skylar: Make me as blurry as possible. My eyes glow. I'm in places I logically can't be in. 

[Eleven]
[Modern!AU, when Skylar is still mad at Zoro]
Zoro: I love you.
Skylar: [Not looking up from the book she's reading] Wrong number.
Zoro: You're sitting right here.
Skylar: Wrong address.
Zoro: Wait, wha—
Skylar: Please leave a message after the tone. Beep.

[Twelve]
Nami: Would it kill you to stop taking 40-minute showers?
Skylar: Physically? No. Emotionally? The toll would be catastrophic. 

[Thirteen]
[Under the Same Roof!AU]
Skylar: Can we talk about the text that you just sent to everyone?
Luffy: It was a critical update.
Skylar: It just says, "I'm back on my bullshit."
Luffy: The people need to know.

[Fourteen]
Luffy: I am the kind of person that likes to think things through.
Skylar: Since when? I once saw you eat a marshmallow that was still on fire. 

[Fifteen]
[Road Trip!AU]
Nami: How did you break your wrist? Wrong answers only.
Skylar: Smacking the West Virginia Mothman statue's juicy metal ass so hard it shattered.
Nami: I said wrong answers only, this isn't confession.
Usopp: Your wrist or the ass???