joe bodon/reader

donalds revolution

donalds pov 

i was sitting there eating dora's prosthetic (i use big words) tittie because i was a normal human being and not some pedo who likes to date 12 yr olds when my boyfriends simultaneously yelled  

"are you just gonna let y/n get away with this?" accused biden

diego questioned "can I have a piece of your my sisters tittie?" 

i was kinda annoyed at biden for personal reasons so I kind of just ignored him. obviously, i didnt want to share dora's tittie so i said "nah m8 go fk urself" 

dora was still on the ground crying and diego joined her, and they died a painful death together.

i looked up for a second and than went back to eating dora's tittie."YOU KILLED OUT BOYFRIEND!" yelled my boyfriend.

i looked up from eating dora's tittie and looked straight into joes eyes. I was tired of being treated like i dont mean anything to anyone, so I decided to revolt. i grabbed the cannon y/n left and said to bijoe "REVENGEEEEEEEEEE," dragging out the e. 

i shot the cannon at joe and he doubled over in pain. while he was distracted, i grabbed a bloody knife from the floor and used it to cut his toes off. he kept screaming and crying while i looked a sewing needle and string and once i found one I sewed joe's toes onto my feet. 

joe slowly sat up from wear he was laying and something along the lines of "I'm breaking up with you" and "YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS." 

i skipped along the sidewalk, chewing on the final peice of dora's fake tittie while humming r/s (random song) 

- to be continued!