it's not living if it's not with you | harry lewis/wroetoshaw

chapter fourteen

16th December

Harry stared at Stella's back, illuminated by the faint bit of light coming from the cracks in the door.

"Stella?" He whispered. "I know you don't want to speak to me, but I just wanted you to know how sorry I am. I-"

He stopped, nearing the bed. "I wasn't thinking properly, and I know that's not an excuse but I'm never going to be like that again, I was just-"

He was just what? How could he express how he felt if he didn't even know?

"I'm just sorry."

Stella shuffled slightly, moving her arm under her pillow. Okay, so she had still been asleep this whole time. It was fine, at least now he had got that off his chest he could properly think of how to word his apology. It was ironic how many times Harry had almost been cancelled on twitter, but now he was sweating over apologising to one of his mates.

Harry decided that he should probably sleep on the floor of the room, so as soon as Stella would wake up, he would immediately be there to apologise.

Since Cal had chose not to give him any clothes or had forgotten, he was most likely going to freeze if he didn't wear any clothes to sleep. However, his joggers were now soaked from getting snow on his legs from being sat outside, so he wouldn't be able to wear them. Trying not to wake the girl, he carefully pulled off his joggers and threw them on the floor, opting to keep his sweatshirt on.

Harry picked up one of the pillows that Stella wasn't sleeping on and placed it on the floor. He laid on the floor for a while before accepting that he wasn't going to be able to get to sleep there. Picking the pillow off the floor and placing back on the bed, he peeled the covers back to see that Stella was exactly in the middle, not leaving much room for him.

Nevertheless, he slid into the bed, and pulled the covers over him. In that moment he realised how close the two of them were. Stella's back was pressed to his side, as she was curled up on her own side.

His whole body was tensed. Catching a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye, he noticed how she was practically a mountain of a blankets with it all piled on top of her.

You've slept next to her before, this isn't a big deal.

Letting out a small sigh of relief, Harry slumped further down the bed and tried to get comfy. He tried resting his eyes to see if he could try and force himself to sleep, but to no success, he laid there awake, looking at the ceiling.

Harry tensed up again when he felt Stella shuffle slightly next to him. Glancing at her worriedly, he saw that she was moving restlessly in her sleep.

Stella opened up her eyes slowly, noting that it was still dark outside and groaned softly, moving her back to adjust positions. Suddenly, she felt her back graze something else behind her and she froze in place.

"Stella?" She heard someone whisper. Harry. "It's just me."

When she recognised the voice as Harry's, she rolled over onto her other side, dragging the covers with her.

As soon as she rolled over, she saw the boy laying on his back, giving her an apprehensive look. He looked like he hadn't slept at all, from the slight dark circles under his eyes, only making him look more aged alongside the scruff.

"Since when did you come back?" Stella furrowed her eyebrows at him.

"Since I realised the couch isn't big enough for me to sleep on."

Stella laughed lightly, before going quiet again.

"You've been a real dickhead, you know that?"