The Hijinks War

43. Gone

I sat up and examined my small sleeping space in a panic. It was still dark outside, and though I'd not been alone when I went to sleep, I was when I woke. Where had Kellen gone? Not that I really cared, but it was just so damn early!

But, good riddance! Because, if Jackson had woken up before us and seen us all curled up together, there would have been no way the whole camp wouldn't think we were, as Jackson's plaything had so nicely put it, boning.

I tapped the button on my watch that backlit the screen and took in the time; 5:30 a.m. Our alarms were set for 8:00 a.m., so I wondered what could have pulled him out of the blind so early. I could still hear Jackson's snoring and the girlish whine of his friend's breathing on the other side.

I debated going back to sleep, but I was already too awake. I grabbed the book out of my pack and opened it to the page I'd marked, deciding he was most likely at the latrines. The latrines, ten minutes away, well downwind of camp. That's where he'd gone. Without his jacket.

It was too cold for anyone to be out there without a jacket or coat. I tucked the book back in my bag, redid my ponytail and rolled Kellen's jacket under my arm, before I pushed my way out the flap.

I scanned the site below me. Squatting around one of the fire pits were four figures―one of them looked colder and stupider than the rest.

"What is wrong with you, Kellen?" I grumbled as I approached the group, after fumbling down a rope ladder. "Are you trying to freeze to death?"

All four faces turned to me, their expressions varying from alarm to guilt. As Kellen took his jacket from me and shrugged it on, I noted that he wouldn't meet my eyes. With him were Katia, Ashley and Robert. What were Katia and Ashley doing here? Why did they look like they'd murdered my dog? Or my best friend?

"What's going on?"

Robert shoved his hands into his pockets and looked at the fire as if it held the answers to life within its flames.

"Katia?" I folded my arms and glared at her.

"Well, you should know that we've been trying to figure out how to tell you." Katia's eyes swept to Ashley as she said this.

"Where's Jess, Ash?" I finally realized that Jess should have been there with Ashley.

"I don't know," she whispered, her tone terrified and eyes filled with tears. "I woke up at about 4, and Jess was gone. Her pack, her sleeping bag, everything."

"What?" I asked dumbly, my stomach dropping away from me. "Gone?" I wobbled where I stood, and Kellen pulled me down to sit beside him before I could fall.

"Emma's gone too." Robert sounded melancholy. "I was coming to tell you and Kellen, when I saw them all here."

Emma too? I realized as I looked at him that he and Emma must have been way more than I'd known about, if he'd noticed her missing in the middle of the night.

"She left a note." The writing on the top of the paper that Robert handed me was not Emma's, but Jess'.

I fumbled to unfold it, and after two tries, I let Kellen do it for me.

Nic, Babes,

You can kick my butt for this later, like I know you want to, I promise. You've had so much on your plate lately, so I decided to take this part off your hands. Emma and I are going to town so we can call for help. Please don't worry about us too much, we...

The words got too blurry for me to read the rest of the note. Somehow, I managed to get words out without crying, numbly announcing why they'd left.

"Shit!" Kellen read over my shoulder. "Emma already had all the maps, and she and Jess planned this while we were busy."

Sweet Unsū, I felt sick! "But..." My voice was so tiny, choked to a barely there squeak. "What if they're not safe?"

"They took a couple others with them, and enough supplies..."

"Others? Who?" Katia's voice was alarmed. In any other situation, I would be doing as she was, trying to figure out if the ones that had gone were vital to the larger group's survival. But as our small group huddled together and discussed that she'd done what we were going to anyway, I was consumed by worry. The larger group's survival did not matter to me then. Only Jess did.

I'd already had to give up Eddie, and I wasn't stupid enough to think that I would see him on the other side of this. Hoped to yes, but expected to, no. I could not lose my Jess, too. How could she have planned this without me? How could she not have told me? She'd been avoiding me, I realized, not the Nest.

Angry, worried and terrified beyond belief, I could feel the pressure of water buildup pushing at my eyes and a headache beginning to bloom behind my forehead. My hands shook so badly, I dropped the paper, so that the others wouldn't see. I sat on them, but I still felt the vibration of fear and anger running through my entire body.

Conversation swirled around me on whether or not we should announce the initiative to everyone. I clenched my jaw, so hard that I felt my teeth would crack, yet it didn't seem to curb what I was feeling.

"Eeergh!"

The sound was startling enough as it was, I'm sure, but it was accented by me punching Kellen just as suddenly. It didn't have the desired effect; I would have to punch a hundred people and possibly break some bones to feel even the slightest bit of calm reaching me. My fists flailed out again and Kellen caught them this time, expecting a second onslaught.

I didn't fight him, instead headbutting the solidness of his chest and pressing my face into his jacket. He let go of my fists and hugged me. "It's ok, Cole. It's ok. She'll be fine." :(

"Uh... er... we'll just... yeah..." Katia, sounding uncomfortable as I'd never heard her, dragged the others away. To where I don't know. I didn't care to know. I just wanted to stop the gob-awful whining, squealing, hungry puppy yaps that were hiccoughing from my mouth.

"It's ok, Babe." Kellen's arms squeezed me to his chest as he whispered to me. "It's ok. She'll be fine."

He kept repeating it like it was a mantra at a Yoga class—as he stroked my back and rested his chin on my head, as he rearranged how we were sitting to a more comfortable position, as I bit down on his upper arm to shut myself up. Even when I eventually began to calm down, and he pressed his forehead to mine, he said the words. It's okay, Babe, she'll be fine. 

"It's ok, Cole. It's ok, Babe. She'll be fine."

Fun Note: Unsū is the hardest kata in karate, which contains a difficult jump that requires the practitioner to turn 360 degrees around in the air. So it definitely has the potential to make one feel as sick as Nicole felt when she said it.