Changes

24

I decide to take Tim's advice, and tell Finn, Zac, Micah and Ryder how I feel.

I'm going to wait until Ryder gets home, though. I'm also going to talk to Lio about the notebook, if he doesn't ask about it first.

I spend most of the rest of the day with Zac and Finn. Aiden and Dominic come downstairs to go out, and say hi to me before they go out the door. We're on the couch, eating cookies as Finn tells me about the time when Ryder got drunk, and almost beat up a guy who talked to Finn.

"Jake? Can I talk to you?"

I look over at the doorway. Lio looks nervous. That's never a good sign.

"Yeah," I say, getting up off the couch. I follow him up to our room.

The room looks the same-I'm not sure why I thought it would look different. We sit on the bed.

"So, I found that notebook," He says.

I nod, looking down at the bed. "Yeah."

"Where'd you find it?"

"It was in the sunroom. Did you read it all?"

He nods, trying a smile. "DJ's real name is Devin. He said only Carlos and Gray called him that."

"Lio," I sigh.

"I know, I know. I didn't think Carlos was...I can't believe he would..."

"Kill himself?"

He sighs. "Yes, that."

"He didn't, technically." I murmur. "He was on his way there, when..."

"Yeah. I talked to DJ about it. He had no idea. But he said their parents weren't arguing over who had to keep him, it was who got to keep him. But he didn't realize that. It was all a misunderstanding."

"I thought...I don't know, I thought it was my fault."

"What? Why?"

"I should've known that he was hurting. I could've done something-"

"He didn't tell anyone. You couldn't have known. It's not your fault."

"That's what Tim said," I mumble.

"Then maybe he's not as much of an idiot as I thought." He smiles.

"Oh, I forgot. He had a theory about all my exes."

I explain what Tim and I talked about.

"That would actually explain it, but...Ace said Gray hates you."

"Hates me?"

He nods. "Gray is apparently in love with me, and he thought we were together. Ace didn't mention Gray doing anything like that, but that would make sense. He's still honoring his promise to Carlos, but messing with you, too."

"How's he messing with me?" I ask, frowning.

"You were worried that you were bad luck or something, right? That was probably his goal."

I nod. That makes sense. "Did you ever tell DJ about..."

"Yeah," He blushes. "Last week. It was an accident."

"How was it an accident?"

"Well...we were on the phone, and before I hung up, I said 'bye, love you," I laugh, and he smiles. "What about you? Are you going to tell them?"

"...Yes."

"You are?" He grins. "That's great!"

"Yeah. When Ryder gets back."