Gold Foil

Chapter Three: A Light in the Darkness

It's so numbing.

So infuriatingly frustrating and Suguru wants nothing more than to scream until his throat is bloodied. One month has passed since his wedding and Suguru hasn't been allowed to leave the apartment since then- the large windows and balcony only mock him by giving him something that's just out of reach. It's humiliating and it gnaws at his raw nerves, leaving him with a short fuse.

Night after sleepless night, Suguru is left by himself to drown in his thoughts. Since their wedding- Gojou had insisted that Suguru can have the bed for a reason he wouldn't voice. If Suguru didn't feel isolated before, having a cold and empty bed, in an apartment that wasn't originally his, definitely makes him feel isolated and unwanted.

It's one of those nights and Suguru can't sleep. He tried counting sheep and when that failed, he tried to count the stupid glow in the dark stars Gojou has scattered over the ceiling. He paced around the room and even propped open the window to be lulled to sleep by the busy nightlife of Tokyo. Despite his best efforts, he just can't sleep. In the distance, a train roars past with a blare of its horn and the vibrations make the building shake. Suguru takes a moment to pause all of his self-wallowing to direct all of his growing irritation at the passing train.

Whose grand idea was it to have trains run at night?

Suguru sits up, his dark hair spills over his shoulders. Fumbling around in the dark, he finds a hair tie and quickly pulls his hair into a haphazard bun. Padding over to the window, he's just able to make out the train's outline as it continues to speed by. Occasionally, the moon shines through the overcast and he sees the train clearly, its dark paint and silver wheels gleam under the moonlight.

Another sorrowful whistle from the train cuts through the silent night.

Something within him stirs and Suguru wants nothing more than to break free from the apartment and escape on the train. It brings a small smile to his lips when he imagines living a life where he just rides various trains and is far away from any sort of civilization.

It's at times like this, Suguru wishes that he had declined Gojou's proposal. Even if he was on the run, he would've been free. He would've taken the girls and left to live the best life that he could give them. They don't need to be around sorcerers and they especially don't deserve to be under the elders' watchful eye. There's not a doubt in Suguru's mind that Mimiko and Nanako have piqued their interest. If he had a stronger resolution, he'd break into the school right now and take the girls far away from everything.

His ideations leave with the disappearing train and reality comes rushing back. Sighing, Suguru pushes away a stray lock of hair and then presses a hand against the cold windowpane. When the glass around his fingers fogs up, his gaze drops to the ring and then he looks away.

He's just as much a prisoner as the girls.

It's been a month since their marriage. A month and a week since he's seen Mimiko and Nanako. Yaga had told him that they need time to make sure that there's no underlying health issues from their living conditions and get them into therapy. He's been constantly told to wait. Wait. Wait.

And wait.

Over breakfast, Suguru wraps his hands around the hot ceramic of the mug and breathes in the smell of coffee. He had tried to eat a slice of toast earlier but it tasted like he was eating a curse, the disgusting taste of rancid vomit had filled his mouth and Suguru instantly lost all of his appetite.

"What do you look so grim for? You're acting like being married to me is the worst thing in the world." Gojou speaks with a mouth full of cereal, pointing the spoon in his direction. "Y'know, there's tons of people out there who would jump at the chance of being married to me." Suguru rolls his eyes at Gojou's crooked grin and takes a long sip from his coffee.