You Look Better Dead

How Did You Do It

Collectively, I decided that getting my own place would beneficial for me since Khalil has moved on and William is grown up all on his own with my uncle. So, living in that place would be a reminder of a life I could have lived but didn't.

I went shopping yesterday and threw out the clothes that they got for me. I looked in the mirror  and noticed I was more masculine. I used to look feminine. My curves were replaced my muscles mass and my hair was braided down. I still look kinda feminine like I could still pull off a less masculine look if I wanted too but I felt comfortable in the style that I'm in.

I walked out of my house and got into my car. I had a busy day ahead of me. The people of America still think I'm dead so today they want to announce I'm alive. I couldn't be more frightened of the outcome of a situation.

I drove to the White House which apparently the Wild cards are based now . If anyone were to tell me I helped take over the White House and get to work in it. I would have looked at them crazy but hey that was my mindset 19 years ago.

I'm a new person. I want to live my life. I want to forget the past and move forward.

I parked my car. Giving the keys to a guard to move it to a private location. I walked up the stairs. Regretting every step towards the front doors. William met me at the door and we walked in. He talked about the plan some and told me what today would entail.

Just as I feared.

"You will give a statement about your disappearance" William said. I sighed and continued walking. I didn't speak much. My mind raced and I couldn't find the right words to say. It was like I was mute. I couldn't feel the urge to speak anymore. I felt like my voice was locked away.

"London"

I was knocked out of my head and focus back to reality. I saw I was in the famous Oval Office. It looked better than before. I went to get sit in the guest chair but was redirected to the main chair.

"This is where you'll give your statement" William stated. Continuing to get things together before I have to go live and tell the world I'm alive.

I want to stay dead. Stay secluded, alone.

Khalil showed up with uncle James. Soon the press followed in right after them. I saw the cameras, the eager eyes, and most of all the unspoken questions that I soon will dread to answer.

When will this be over.

"Okay, stare into this camera," William said. Pointing towards the camera man. I focused my attention towards that camera and took a deep breath in.

"Hello, I'm London Walker and I'm alive,"

Question started to fly every where.

Where have I been?
What was my motivation?
What did I endure?
Is America what I dreamed it to be?

My mind couldn't focus until on question that stood out. A question that became the reason I almost feared.

"Where were you for 19 years?" A man asked.
Where was I. How can I answer that question.

"I- I was kidnapped"

"By who?, Who saved you?, Did you save yourself?"

I soon started to become overwhelmed. The room became hot and tight. I couldn't catch my breathe.

"I saved him" Khalil stated. Which made things worse.

"Why did it take you 19 years to find him?" A women asked. She stood in front with her pen and notepad. "If London Walker is an important man, then why take so long to find him"

The room got

silent.

"Was it because you feared that if he came back it would ruin the relationship you had to re-build with you current wife?" The same women asked. I felt myself sink into my chair. I couldn't handle this anymore. I can't breathe.

"Listen, it doesn't matter why it took so long, he is safe and free from where he was found and that is all that matters" William said with a hint of anger.

"Are you sure"

"Am I sure of what" William asked the female reporter.

"That now London is free, that he is safe," she stated. "Can you be sure that the same people who took him won't come back and get him"

After that was said. I stood up and everyone looked at me.

My body started to shake and I felt my heart pace even faster. I need to get out of here. I ran past everyone. Pushing the reporters out of the way as they shoved cameras and questions in face. I left the room quickly. Finding the nearest empty room that could lock me away from everyone.

I finally took a deep breath in. I didn't realize I held my breathe for so long. I sat in the nearest chair and started to cry.

This is not what I wanted. This is not how I picture myself being while being the leader of the new America. I'm not the same London Walker that I was. Tears still running from my face, I couldn't see that I wasn't alone in the room.

"So London, how has freedom been treating yah" someone said with a familiar Russian accent.

"Victor" I look up and there he is. Where the last place I thought he could be. In the damn White House. "If you came here to kill me, please do it"

"Oh I didn't come here to kill you but quite the opposite actually, I came here to save you" he threw me a set of clothes that I wouldn't be recognized in. I looked at him In confusion. "Look, you were right, what you said in Russia was true so I thought I return the favor for killing the man that made me the man I am today"

I laughed.

"You mean to tell me the man who kidnapped me want to save me," I said as I laughed. "Damn you're such a cliche"

Talking to Victor felt normal. I felt oddly comfortable. Like could trust him in this moment.

"Screw you, get changed, I have a care waiting outside" he said and I got changed quickly. We headed out and passed everyone like we're ghost. We hoped in the car and I decided to do something that I would never have done during those 19 years.

I kissed him.