Metalocalypse: Impending Doom

Chapter Nine: Salem

The day after temporarily moving into Mordhaus proved to be a bit underwhelming, not that Salem was complaining about the small break.

Sure, Tobias was going on about some sort of storm that caught the citadel on fire, and sure, Nathalia was obsessively watching Toki's every move after he had supposedly passed out. And yes, Salem didn't feel all that well after waking up to a new day, and it stayed consistent throughout.

But it was a much better alternative than getting drunk and making a fool of oneself, or watching a friend suffer with seizures, or being bombarded with life-altering information from someone with a crackhead personality.

Salem sighed. They cared a lot about Nathalia, but her obsession for getting dick (it was obvious she was excited about this little meeting with Nathan, her idol) was a bit much when she became irritated for being interrupted. But what was Salem to do?

They were terrified of watching the seizures and being helpless. At the very least, Nathalia was able to prepare better in that kind of situation. All Salem could do was cry and have a panic attack, which would cause people to worry about them and they didn't want to be looked after.

Then Salem smiled sadly. If they had been interrupted during a meeting with Pickles, they'd probably be upset too. Just... not as much.

Salem was also not dumb and knew that Nathalia was plotting, possibly that very second, to get Salem and Pickles together so that she could get info about the other drummer's... situation. The only reason they were not particularly upset about this was because they really really liked him. But they did find it somewhat offensive that someone could so blatantly disrespect the concept of someone's privacy to their own identity. But as someone who liked to stay quiet a lot about a lot of problematic things, Salem kept their mouth shut.

Unfortunately, Salem hadn't seen much of him yesterday because he was apparently working on something for the album. In fact, Salem hadn't seen much of anybody yesterday because they had fallen so ill. But today was a new day, day three of staying at Mordhaus.

Salem bit their lip as they thought back on yesterday. It was about 5 or 6 am and they hadn't been able to sleep the entire night, so they had nothing else to do with their time.

They hadn't gotten into a fight with Nathalia, but they knew that they had made her worried when they had suddenly gone pale and passed out onto the floor while discussing Toki's injuries.

Waking up to a concerned Nathalia was not something Salem ever wanted to encounter, because it was lowkey embarrassing.

"Bruh, bruuhhhhhhhhh, are you okay!?" Nathalia had practically shouted into the other's ear, causing Salem to groan in pain. "Answer me you lifeless fucking zombie!" Nathalia shook them by the collar desperately until Tobias had to grab her and remind her that Toki was sleeping just a few feet away and not to wake him. It worked.

Salem had reached up with weak hands and pried her hands off of their neck, scooching back on their butt to prevent more manhandling. "Fucking Christ, you're gonna kill me."

"Well maybe I should, as payback for you fucking falling!" Nathalia had scoffed at the shorter one. "What happened?"

"I don't know," Salem had spoken, standing up on weak legs and stretching their limbs out. They've fainted like that before many times, and usually all for the same reason.

"Well, go sit somewhere so I can take a look at you," Nathalia ordered, and Salem pursed their lips.

"I'm fine."

"Like fuck you are."

Salem had smiled a little. "I just need to rest, in MY room. Okay?"

"Does this have anything to do with your alcohol intake? Or drug intake?" Salem shot Tobias a dirty look for butting in, but only because of the second part. He stared blankly back until realizing that he had actually said that out loud, and grimaced.