Dusk [sequel to Aurora] - HS AU

Chapter 11

I broke your heart so carelessly
But made the pieces part of me
And now it hurts what we've become
'Cause you taught me how to love
It's me who taught you how to stop
And you just say, I drink too much
Maybe I'm defective
Or maybe I'm dumb
I'm sorry, so sorry for what I've done
Maybe I'm bad natured
Or maybe I'm young
I'm sorry, so sorry for what I've done

Song: Sorry, by Nothing But Thieves

***

2020, July 8th, Tuesday | 6 a.m

Harry's P.O.V.:

The room is still dark as I emerge from my restless sleep.

It has been like this for months now, little to no sleep, night after night. I was never one to have a normal night schedule, but at least I would sleep for enough hours when I finally got to bed. It wasn't the healthiest of habits, but it was something.

Way better than going to bed at 11 pm, only to trash around until 4, then wake up at 6 am, seemingly even more tired than before I tried to sleep.

I thought having her here would help, but it hasn't. At least, not yet anyways.

We arrived in New York last night, the both of us so tired and confused with jet lag, we came straight home and went to bed a little after. I won't lie, it was such a relief to watch Aster stepping into my apartment again, how Brie and Tate were happy to see her, and the tears of joy in her eyes as she looked around the place and sighed in satisfaction.

My mother and Robin were already sleeping in the guest's room, but they left a flower bouquet and pizza to welcome us back home. Between everything, I forgot to mention to Aster they were still staying here, but she didn't seem to care about the extra company.

Which suits me well, considering we have another company here that I have no idea how she'll react.

We went to bed around 11 last night, with the intention of waking up early today to go visit my father in the hospital. He has been staying there for a couple of months now, it is not safe for him to be home anymore; the seizures are more and more constant, he has been having some mental confusion lately and, to top it all, for about a month now he simply can't hold his bladder anymore. Between staying home with an adult size diaper or at the hospital with a catheter and a fully equipped crew to take care of him 24/7, it wasn't a difficult choice to make.

Aster dozed off almost immediately, humming in her sleep with a shadow of a smile playing on her lips, which makes me believe she really enjoys being back home. I, on the other hand, wasn't able to have a blink of sleep, leaving the bed when it was around 4 in the morning to come to the balcony and smoke a cigarette downstairs, where I'm standing 2 hours later.

My mind is rushing too much, and only now that we're back, I realize how hard things are going to be from now on. I was so focused on getting Aster back, because I need her by my side, that I didn't think of the possibility of her not wanting to be by my side after she finds out about everything. Now that she's here, sleeping and still completely unaware of how things are, I'm positively panicking over the possibility of everything being just too much for her.

The sun is still rising on the horizon, tinting the sky with pastel tones of pink, orange and baby blue, and as I finish my second cigarette of the day, I realize she'll wake up at any moment now, and it would be the best if I'm still in bed with her when it happens. Visiting hours at the hospital starts at 9, and even though I can't wait to see my dad again, I'm still not sure if Aster will even want to go with me after she finds out about who else is staying at my place.