The state that I'm in. (BEING EDITED)

confrontation

I don't know what felt worse: the fact that my mother replied to Harry, him being there at the same time as her, him casually mentioning that his dad might be coming...the list is endless.
Needless to say that I was speechless and motionless.
"I'm coming in honey" she said as if to wake me from my trance but nothing could prepare me for this.

I stepped aside letting her in again still not being able to utter a word. She entered the apartment hastily and went into the living room placing her bag on the floor before sitting down on the sofa her arms resting on her lap. Her presence there meant only one thing: she knew. Regardless of how many times I rehearsed the things I wanted to say in my head, it was unbelievably difficult to word them.

“So, how have you been honey?” she said obviously questioning how to start with the conversation  she came here for when suddenly Rose came in the room to greet her accompanied by Harry whose eyes reflected the anxiety he had to be feeling. He looked at me and then at the floor. He looked back at me as if to gain strength and then again he moved his eyes away placing his hands in his jeans pockets a clear sign of discomfort.

“Rose! How are you sweetie? I haven’t seen you for a while…” she stood up and gave her a warm embrace while her eyes were aiming at Harry.

“I’m fine Leah…I’m doing great…” Rose responded and as soon as my mum released her, Harry cleared his throat…

“Hello Mrs. Cameron, I am… I’m Harry” he said taking his hand out of his pocket offering a handshake.

“I know who you are…” my mum confirmed my assumptions “I am Leah…nice to meet you” she continued shaking his hand then leaving it looking back at me.

“Yeah..mm..you, too” he replied .

“I am sorry to intrude but I need to talk to my daughter…in private” she continued her words targeting me.

“Yeah sure…Rose let’s go get some coffee” he told her and she nodded both taking their keys before heading to the door.

Harry looked at me one last time before leaving, his eyes showing everything he couldn’t say. He gave me half a smile and then he left.

Confrontation time. I still had not spoken a word…what was I supposed to say. She knew already…and at the state I was in I could not build my defense.

“So…when were you planning to tell me, Valerie?” she asked me in an accusatory tone.

I stood there. Nothing came out of my mouth.

“Were you planning to tell me at all?”

Some seconds passed before she went on.

“I can see what you see in him. He is obviously sinfully handsome…but darling so are you…” her eyes were pleading asking for reasons, excuses, justifications but I couldn’t speak…I just couldn’t.

“Valerie…he is married. He has a son with another woman. Do you understand? Do you want to be the other woman? Do you want to be the one who keeps a family apart?”

I wanted to scream and tell her that it wasn’t me who kept them apart, that I didn’t break them up but again nothing… I just stared at her trying to figure out how on earth I would make her understand.

“His wife called me, honey. She called our house. She told me everything. Thank God it was me who answered the phone and not your dad. Do you know what you are getting yourself into? Is this the life that you want for yourself? Do you want to share a man with someone else? He might be with you but you are still sharing. He will always have a child with someone else and that is something so precious…can you compete with that?” and my fears came back to life…how could I compete with that…