The A-Z Of Sex (Complete)

New York, New York

"I need help!" I drop down onto the wooden bench that Shawns sitting on whilst eating an apple, apparently on his lunch break and attempt to catch my breath

He doesn't even look up at me he just keeps staring ahead "What is it you need my help with now Teddy?"

"I'm juggling boys!" I whisper yell, in case the 'Bitch Boss' is anywhere around but he just turns to me slightly with his eyebrows lowered "Shubman wants a second date..." that got his interest as his eyebrows shoot to his hair line "And Tyler wants to meet"

He shakes his head and takes a bite of his shiny green apple "Here's a mini lesson for you. For a guy that treats you like your ex did there are no second chances, no going back" he spares me a side glance and I see something flicker in his eyes but he's staring straight ahead again before I can put a name to it

"What if he's sorry though?"

"Sorry for what he said? Sorry for cheating? Sorry for what exactly Camila? What out of all of this would him being sorry for actually change?"

"...nothing" my voice is like that of a child as I place my hands on my knees and gaze at my chewed fingernails, feeling silly now for actually being excited by the thought of two men showing interes in me

"Don't go back Camila, not ever" his voice is sad and flat, I'm not used to it and I don't like it at all

"Have I done something wrong?" I ask, expecting the answer to be yes because recently, everything I do seems to be wrong

"No you haven't done anything wrong, trust that I would tell you if you had "

"Thank you" I reply as we sit in a silence that now feels heavy but easy and out of nowhere Shawns arm slips around my shoulder and he pulls me to him, kissing me softly and then deepening it with that hunger I'm beginning to love because it's the first time in my life I actually feel wanted and desired.

I'm beginning to realise that with Tyler it was as if he was filling in time by kissing me but with Shawn it's as though he would die without it and even though it's fake I want that feeling, need that feeling

He doesn't add his tongue this time and it doesn't last anywhere near long enough but as he pulls away I can hear  myself panting for breath in the lunchtime air

"What was that for?"

"New rules remember"

Of course.

He doesn't actually want or desire me. He's just teaching me how to react to someone that does and it stings to realise that he wouldn't actually die without kissing me

"You're quiet and grumpy, I don't like it. Where's the ego? Where's the 'how many times can I make Camila blush today?'"

"In the gym, on the office floor" his reply makes me shiver. His voice is so empty of emotion that it scares me to think about what happened to take that from him

"Whose office?" I dare to ask

"My boss" I let out a breath loudly, so pleased her didn't say her. I don't know what has gone on between her and Shawn in the past but I know it isn't good. "He's sending me to New York on a training weekend"

"Wow!" He frowns at me "Okay not wow... but New York, New York" I give him some jazz hands desperate to see him smile but he just takes another bite of his apple before throwing the core across the park

"I'm the only one from the gym chosen to go"

"Okay..." I don't know why but he sounds so small and so lost that I reach out and take his hand in mine causing him to actually look at me for what feels like the first time today "Just in case she's watching" I tell him as I give his fingers a squeeze and smile when he tightens his grip

"Business class flight, top hotel, everything paid for"

"It sounds amazing"

"It would be"

"If?"

"If Candi wasn't coming too"

"What?!" I don't mean to sound so shocked but this is turning more and more disturbing, the more I learn

"It's her attempt to get me alone, get me away from you, flaunt her wealth and her lifestyle in an attempt to impress me"

"Has she done this before?" He just nods his head slightly "And did it work?" My heart starts to hammer against my rib cage as my breathing speeds up in anticipation of what he's about to tell me

"Hence the reason I'm in this situation"

I wrap my spare arm around his waist and hold him to me and I watch as his eyes drop shut and he slowly shakes his head as if he can't believe what's going on

"I was younger then, had just had my heart smashed into a million pieces and trampled on by the first girl I thought I loved. Candi was there to help pick up the pieces, or so I thought, I saw her as a mother figure but I guess she..."

"She saw you as something else"

"She was relentless, cornering me, texting me, stalking my social media and then came the trip to Orlando, same set up as this only I was young, I got drunk and we had sex"

His words feel like actual blows to my gut

"That was it, she had me. She found out that I owed some people some money, some pretty unpleasant people and every time I told her no she threatened to get me fired"

"That bitch! How can you work here after that?!"

"Because if I leave she's going to go to the people I owe money to"

"Can't you just pay them off?!"

"It's a lot of money Camila, more than i have now and more than I will have in the future"

"Oh Shawn!" I throw my arms around his neck and kiss the soft skin in an attempt to show comfort

"What do I do Teddy?" He whispers into my hair

"Long term? I don't know. New York? Take me with you"

I had no idea I was going to say that until the words left my mouth and it wasn't what he was expecting either because he pulls away from me and looks down at me in shock

"Tell your boss you want to surprise your girlfriend and I will buy a ticket and come with you"

"No... are you sure?!"

"I love New York"

"You'd do that for me?"

"In a situation like this? Of course. You might be a dick and I might hate you for ruining my date but you don't deserve this and I do deserve a weekend in New York. What do you think? Can you give me lessons in New York?"

"If you're willing to do this for me I'll give you lessons anywhere"

"And you'll help me prepare for my second date and not turn up and ruin it?!"

"Of course" he says smiling but I notice it doesn't reach his eyes "I can finally see what Aaliyah sees in you, you're a good kid Teddy"

Kid...

That word...

He's my tutor...

My best friends brother...

The guy that's helping me prepare for a second date...

So why does that word hurt so much?

*a change of pace but don't worry it's just for this chapter please list me know what you though x