chapter xii. coming home-2 (final)

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chapter xii. coming home-2

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Relieved.

It is a feeling that you had not expected to find when you thought about opening yourself to Seokjin tonight. It feels liberating to be able to share your past, especially with someone who understands, someone who knows what it feels like to live in the darkness while the entire world around you continues to turn and evolve as you remain standing still.

But you also have never expected to find his words alleviating the remnants of your pain, becoming the remedy that you have unknowingly been searching for in such a long time. If his presence had managed to fill your lonely days before to the point that the days you spent with him and his daughter simply gave you a new purpose in your daily life, you begin to feel it even more now, when you can finally feel your life slowly shifting into a new direction, with a new light at the end of this path you are taking with him.

The tears that are still falling from your eyes no longer come from your pain, but instead from relief, from the way you are finally being freed from all the shackles binding you to the past. In his arms, you no longer feel like you are simply a broken piece of your old self, when his hold gives you a feeling as if you have returned home, secured, and completely safe from the darkness of the past that has been haunting you. In his hold, you feel present, no longer lost in the void without so much of a purpose aside from surviving and continuing to live.

His hold gives you strength, while the look in his eyes makes you feel brave enough to hope again, to let this feeling inside you bloom further instead of keeping it hidden the way you have been before.

You have no idea what you have done to deserve his affection, to have this wonderful man who you have witnessed giving his unconditional love to his daughter now holding you tight and keeping you from falling apart. The only thing you know is that you feel no fear of giving in, to embrace and savour this warmth he is giving you to help you breathe easier and make you feel alive again.

For a moment, neither of you speak. No words are spoken as you bask in each other's presence, simply holding onto each other and taking each other in, as if you are seeing one another in a new light now that everything has been laid out in the open.

After a while, Seokjin looks away from your eyes, looking up and down at you as if he is trying to memorise everything about you. From the way your hair is falling over his arm, the way your skin glistens under your drying tears, then he looks down just as you raise your hands, watching how you are holding onto his chest before his eyes return to your face. His gaze lingers on your lips, and your pulse kicks up several notches.

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