Book 1: LILIKA

CHAPTER 11

 "Not knowing who I really am... Is it a blessing or a curse?"

"Tatay? Ikah? Gumising po kayo! Tulong! Tulungan nyo po kami ng tatay at kaibigan ko! Parang awa nyo na tulungan nyo po kami!", narinig kong pilit na sinisigaw ni CJ kahit nanghihina ang kanyang boses.

His crying voice gave me a little strength to come back to my senses. Hindi ko nga lang maintindihan ang ilang sinasabi niya. I feel like I'm partially deaf right now. First time ko siyang marinig na umiyak ng ganito. Lagi lang kasi siyang nakangiti kapag magkasama kami. Please stop crying, CJ. Hindi ko na rin kasi mapigilan ang iyak ko. Hindi ako makabangon para yakapin siya at patahanin. Bakit niya kaya tinatawag na Tatay yung security guard? Heto ba yung ipapakilala sana niya sa akin na father niya? Siya ba yung guard na nakita kong tumatakbo palapit sa amin kanina? Oh, no! Is it my fault kung bakit umiiyak ang kaibigan ko ngayon?

"I'm so sorry, CJ..." hirap na bulong ko pero hindi na yata niya ako marinig dahil sobrang lakas na nung pag iyak niya at maingay na din sa paligid.

Hindi ko alam kung ilang minuto pa ang lumipas bago ko narinig ang isang boses ng babae at isang maliit na bata. Umiiyak sila sa tabi namin at nanghihingi na rin ng tulong sa ibang tao. I heard CJ call out to her, "Nanay..."

I still couldn't hear our surroundings clearly but I felt CJ moved closer and gently held my hand. I squinted my eyes to see his face. There's also a lot of blood dripping off his forehead down to his chin. He's in too much pain like me. I want to tighten my grip on his hand and to also comfort him but my body is refusing to obey me.

"No, CJ! Please... don't leave me alone! I'm scared!", I fearfully screamed in my mind while the medic team took care of me inside the ambulance.

As the vehicle started to move, CJ's voice and face soon became blurry in my mind and then my parents popped up into my hallucination. Their ghost-like figures were beside me and holding my hands in this life or death situation.

I know that I'm just seeing things but in desperation, I still called out for them with all my remaining strength, "Mama... Papa.. I don't wanna die... save me... please..."

And their distorted voices answered, "You'll never learn unless you feel pain...", then they laughed and vanished into thin air.

My heart clenched in pain. I hate my parents! I don't want to be their daughter anymore! Kung hindi siguro occupied yung isip ko about sa argument ng parents ko, napansin ko sana agad yung car. Or hindi na lang sana ako umalis mag-isa! Nagpaalam sana ako ng maayos o kaya ay hinintay na lang si Manang na matapos sa kitchen para nasamahan niya ako. Hindi na sana kami muna nag bike ni CJ. Kung nanatili siguro ako sa house, hindi kami naaksidente ngayon. Hindi sana umiiyak ng ganito ang kaibigan ko. Hindi na rin sana nadamay pa ang father niya na pinilit na mailigtas kami.