Promising The Moon - 《Jaywon》

no.17

Jay now looks at jungwons lips and up to his eyes , they didn't realize how close they became,  if jay did one more move their lips will touch.

Jungwon wasn't himself, Jay's face made him forget about everything and he slowly moved his face closer. Jay did the same too , both moving their face closer into each other, the moon, big, making light , it was so pretty .

Jay noticed what was about to happen and suddenly his dads words hit his mind , it hurts, he didn't want to kiss a boy. Their lips were about to touch but Jay had to break it .

Moving his face away and coughs awkwardly, jungwons face red , he was blushing so hard while jay couldn't even look at his eyes . Picking his nose cuz it itched, gulping and then he spoke.

"Um...sorry ..I'll go" jay said ,kind of stuttered and got up and run away,  going to his room , leaving jungwon alone like that .

Jungwon let out a sight , 'what just happened?"  He thought and lays down on the sand , looking up at the sky.

Jay was in his room, closing the window and putting the curtains on , his heart beat was beating faster , it looked like his heart will fly from his chest and go back to jungwon.

Sitting down in his bed and held his head with his palms, elbows in his knees. Shaking his head "no" he said .
Feeling bad , thinking about his parents, if they know this....let just not think.

Jay was scared, he got trauma by it,  if he saw his dad he would shake , feeling afraid of his own dad . That's sad .
He isn't supposed to feel like this and his dad should act like one , he need to let his kid love who he wants . If it's a boy or girl or wherever.

Since jay is an only child, his parents doesn't want jay to love boys , they want to have grandchildren's. They want jay to be happy with his own family but....jay will never be happy if he marries a girl .

Laying down on the bed , tears rolling down like ocean, nose red from crying, he felt like he was trapped and cant get out , his heart was locked , and now he was about to kiss jungwon.....a boy.

"Why...why am I like this " jay said to himself, he was so sad , he might have a heart block. He needs to calm down . Gripping his sheets , taking the anger out, he wanted to scream but he was to scared to do that , he was scared to do anything. 

Crying silently, in his bed , making his pillows wet with tears . Taking deep breaths so he can stop crying , he felt like a cry baby always crying, but he had enough.

Slowly he calmed down , the tears drying in his cheeks and he closed his eyes , finally falling asleep.

.

"What do you mean he isn't working here ?" Jay spoke , he was waiting for niki to bring his dinner but instead it was a new maid and it was a girl . She looked down " I dont know who is he sir ....mr.pakr hired me " she spoke quietly .

Jay wanted to cry , groaning and he hit the wall with his palm startling that girl "I'm sorry sir" she said.

"Don't call me sir...I have a name " jay said , he was getting mad at his dad , he cant just fired niki and hire another maid .

Jay wasn't talking to her , she left the food there and left . Going down the stairs,  with her short skirt, james wanted her to wear revealing clothes , so jay can have interest in women. So stupid.

"Mr.james ....sir jay doesn't want me as a maid " she said . Her voice tone was like chic . It was annoying.

James nodded and told her to leave , he got up and goes up stairs to his son's room. He entered there and saw jay in his bed , watching TV.

When jay heard that the door opened and he saw that it was his dad , jay having a angry face on ,he didn't want to see his dad at this moment.

"Jongseong " his dad spoke, sitting down on the chair , crossing his legs.
Jay didn't said nothing, he was mad at him , so mad.

"I said jongseong " james again spoke and this time jay looks at him with no emotion in his face. "Why did you upset her" james asked .

"Who?" Jay replied with a question. "Don't play with me....the new maid Sara. " james said .

Jay didn't even want to know her name , even her name sounds annoying to jay . Jay didn't said nothing, he knows that he is wrong for not talking to his dad , james will get even more mad at jay .

"WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO ME " James said , rising his voice at Jay and jay blinked , even the loud noises made him scared , new fear unlocked.

Jay cant do this , he cant just stay quiet about it , his dad was doing to much. "why..WHY DID YOU FIRED NIKI??" jay said , this time yelled , getting up from the couch.

"YOU BITCH " James said and slapped jay , making jay to hold his cheek , feeling hot in his cheek by the slap. "Dont you dare speak to me like that .....he is a boy that's why ....no other man are allowed to be near you " james said and got out from Jay's room , locking it .

Jay froze in his spot , he didn't want to cry again ....he have been crying a lot , no one cares if he cries, but at least he feels better when he cries it out .

'I want to be happy ' jay thought and lays in his bed . Looking up at his ceiling.

'I want to find that someone '. He again thought.

.

Thank you.