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My alarm helps wake me up this morning, the loudness from the sound helped me to be able to jump out of the dream, well nightmare I've been having over and over for the last couple weeks. I hate sleeping alone, but as soon as Von got out the hospital that next morning I had to move into the spare room Ms. Taesha had as the guestroom. Even though everything went down almost over 3 months, things still are very tensed. As if everything went down yesterday. Von was really done with me after he wronged me first.
Of course I was devastated because I really wanted it to work, but now I'm just focusing on myself and our child who is girl. I had 3 more months of this pregnancy which I was excited and freaking out. In 3 more more I would meeting the little person in my belly, Everyday I wonder who this person is and who they will become one day. I just hope she doesn't go through any of the things I have and am currently going through.
I really didn't have anything to do, normally on days of school people my age hang with their friends and do stuff, especially on a friday night. Now that I'm pregnant and have no friends because it was no way I was making amends with Reginae any time soon after what happened at her party. I really didn't want to sit alone at home and just eat, I was already pretty big for six months. Maybe I'll just go to the mall and do a little shopping for my baby girl.
I didnt even have my mom or dad to even hang out with, my parents were still MIA. I also think about them everyday, she they weren't the best but I did love them. Ms. Taesha was at work, so I just had to suck it up. I sigh getting out of bed, going to the bathroom to do my business. Once I clean myself, I have to find something for me to wear, I couldn't fit none of my old clothes so I had to improvise with what I had.
I grab a pair of baggy Jean's, a bikini top bra, after all it was beginning to become summer in Chicago, it was going to be very nice according to my cellphone. I also felt like doing my make up today, it wasn't nothing too dramatic. I have been looking down for a minute, but I'm tired of feeling low. I gotta raise my vibrations and walk into this healing the right way. After getting myself together, I smile at my reflection pleased with the sight.
" You look good Ms. Cherysh", I say smiling, rubbing my belly.
" Wouldn't you agree Charity?" I ask my baby feeling her kicking at my hand.
I laugh a little because I couldn't believe I jas picked that horrible name Davayah months ago, Charity was such a better chose. Closer to mine. She was already going to have Dayvon's last name, I decided I wanted her name closer to mine so Charity was my decision. I haven't told Von, he'll just have to deal with it, it was no way I was dealing with any of the ghetto names he picked.
