A Series of Bad One-Shots

A Spider In The Bathroom

((Hey guys! Welcome to another one shot! Today I'm actually not using the little list I found a while back but instead I'm using a prompt from 'messyotps' on tumblr! And the prompt is: 'Person A never talked to their neighbor Person B before, but they knock on their door in a frantic fashion, begging Person B to kill the spider in their apartment'))

"Ughhhh...." It was two in the morning. Two in the /goddamn/ morning. And yet, Tom was awake. Why was he awake? Because someone was practically banging down his door and not even he could sleep through this noise. Grumbling angrily, he made his was to the door of his (admittedly small) apartment. He opened the door to find one of his neighbors looking absolutely terrified and shivering in his pjs. Tom's anger died down, mainly for two reasons. One: because the guy looked absolutely pitiful and two: because the guy was actually really fucking cute.

"Uh..can I help you with somethin' man?"

"U-Uh yes! Yes you can! Uh, my names Jordan; I live right across from you? And I know this seems really stupid and weird but there's this gigantic spider in my bathroom and I was wondering if you could come kill it? Please? I'll pay you back, I promise!"

Tom raised an eyebrow. A spider? Really? He complemented just refusing and slamming the door shut because it was to fucking early for this. But he knew he couldn't do that. Jordan looked to cute and pitiful to turn down. Tom sighed, rubbing the remaining sleep from his eyes. He was already awake now, might as well.

"Yeah..yeah sure. Lemme just grab something real quick."

The look of absolute relief on Jordan's face was adorable.

"Oh man thank you so much.. Uh. What's your name?"

"I'm Tom. Nice to meet you and all that." He said as he grabbed a broom from the corner of the room. He stepped out of his apartment, shutting the door behind him with one hand.

"Alright, let's go kill this spider, yeah?"

Jordan nodded and lead Tom to his apartment, pointing him to the bathroom.

"Uh, be careful! It's really big.."

"Dude. It's a spider, I'm pretty sure it can't be that big."

Tom chuckled as he opened the bathroom door. He had to admit, seeing how distraught Jordan got over a little spider was actually kind of cute. Of course, when Tom actually saw the spider, the thought that Jordan was overreacting was tossed out of the window. The thing was /huge/, almost the size of a crumbled ball of paper. Tom screeched and shut the door back up, dropping the broom on the ground.

"I told you it was big."

"Shut up."

"..So are you gonna kill it?"

"Nope."

"But you said-"

"That was before I saw that demon from the eighth circle of hell."

Jordan huffed and crossed his arms, glaring obviously attempting to intimidate Tom into killing the spider. But the guy was (barely) five foot something and he was wearing an oversized t-shirt and fluffy pants that had cats on them. He looked less intimidating and more cute, if anything.

"I'm not killing that thing man."

"But I can't sleep with that thing in there!"

Tom went silent for a moment, thinking. He wouldn't wanna sleep in here either after seeing that thing.

"I mean, you can stay over in my apartment until we can get someone to kill it."

"Wait, really?"

Tom shrugged. "Yeah, I don't see why not."

"Oh, well.. Thanks Tom. I appreciate it." Jordan smiled gratefully. Tom was internally cheering.

'Hell yes! He's staying over! Ten points for Tom!'

Tom yawned and picked up the broom off the floor. "Come on, it's like two am and I wanna get back to sleep."

Jordan nodded and they headed back into Tom's apartment.

"So. I figure since you're a guest and all that you can get the bed. I'll take the couch."

"Are you sure? I don't mind sleeping on the couch you know.."

Tom smiled tiredly and waved a hand. "Nah, it's fine. Just go to bed ok? It's still way too early to be up."

"Well, alright if you're sure.. Thanks again Tom."

"No problem Jordan."

They ended up both calling the exterminator the next day.

((And I'm done! Sorry if this ones a bit shorter than most of the others. I didn't really put as much effort into this as I would have liked to but I tried! And probably failed :,D But anyways! I hope you all have enjoyed and I'll see all you people in the next chapter! Later!))