A Completely Different Set-Up

6

3rd Person POV

Shoyo sat on his bed, eyes fixated on the bottom drawer of his desk. He was quickly becoming more hesitant with each second that passed. After all, he'd been avoiding that letter for a year now. He took in shuddering breaths, his mind warped in confusion and anxiety as his chest rose and fell in shudders. The phantom pain in his chest, mimicked his agony from back when he saw the white sheet draped over her, when he saw how cold and lifeless she got. When her brother held him by his collar and sobbed in unforgettable wails that echoed miles. When he sat by the park bench they'd always be at when they'd skip classes to practice in secret, one last time. It was either the end of the world or it might as well have been.

He shook his head and leaned forward, hand on the handle as he pulled the hollow box open. In laid a couple trinkets like keychains and souvenirs from back then, during his travels. Majority of which were from her. All his medals and trophies though were placed in a box underneath his bed. So if ever anyone would raid his place, he wouldn't have to worry about the questions. Shoyo took in another deep breath, and reached his hand into the drawer, and out it came with a pastel-blue grid envelope. At the back, his name was written in swivelled calligraphy, done with white ink. He bit the inside of his cheek as he stood up and walked towards his study-desk.

Contrary to popular belief, Shoyo actually studied.

He placed the small bomb on the wooden table. It was sealed with a single gold sticker in the middle. With the edge of his nail, he neatly pried off the sticker and stuck it at the corner of the envelope. The flap was flipped up and the white paper was slid out. It felt rough in his hands, like every word written was meant to be indented and bold. She always wrote this way, he knew that, and yet everything felt so foreign.

Maybe it was the feeling of nostalgia?

The paper was pressed open and flat against the cold wood. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to do this so late at night? Maybe he could do this tomorrow?

'Stop being a pussy.'

Squeezing his eyes shut, he took one more breath in, before letting it out and opening his eyes.

Dear Sho,

It's really, really weird. We just had our afterparty and suddenly, BOOM! I'm in the hospital! I don't think I'm getting out fine this time, haha.

But it's fine.

Uhuh, totally. Hinata pressed his left thumb knuckle on his lip.

I just wanna say, that even if I won't admit it to your face, I'm really proud of you. I really wouldn't be where I am today, dang I wouldn't be WHO I am today! Like, holy shit! I am so lucky. So, so lucky to have lived, to have lived where I have you in it. In my life.

Or maybe, were.

Shoyo scoffed.

I know firsthand why you would get this letter, I mean, I wrote it, so, obviously. Okay, first of all, I'm betting all my bucks you wont read this 'till a year later or something! You're kind of predictable that way, to me at least. That's fine. Anyway, besides that, I have my reasons to not tell you why I was this way in the first place.

You don't really have a choice to not read it, now do you?

Hinata rolled his eyes, "Haha, very funny." If she was alive and kicking right now, and she said that, he would've punched her shoulder, and she would've screamed something like: "Chivalry truly is dead!"

He smiled fondly at the memory.

I knew how much time I had left, Sho. I always did. It was always an inconclusive number of months to weeks to days, but I really just feel, and have always felt like I only had a short time left until I was just just...gone.