The Aberrations of S.I.D.E.

No. 31: Darkness Hidden

(Warning: spoilers for The Owl House)

"A sicko?!"

"You heard me," Roman said.

Remus shook his head. "I'm sorry—in what universe am I a sicko?"

"When we first watched The Owl House, and Belos's face was revealed, what did you say?"

"I don't—"

"You said '10 outta 10, would bang.' That's sicko behavior."

"Okay, my boyfriend has long hair, a British accent, and a weird thing with his face," Remus reminded him. "And since Belos has all of those things, of course I'd think he was hot."

"He's old."

"So is Eda!"

Roman turned to Virgil. "Back me up here, will you?"

"No, yeah, your brother has a point," Virgil said. "Belos looks cool. I mean, hot isn't the word I'd use, but he's easy on the eyes."

"Probably was a heartbreaker in his time," Janus added.

Roman let out an exasperated sigh. "Look, Hunter is the hot one. Not Belos."

"Hunter is cute," Remus countered. "Belos, on the other hand, is liquid fire."

"You always simp for psychopaths," Roman grumbled, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Literally always."

"He's dating me, Romano," Janus said, elbowing him with a smirk. "You would safely assume that his type is those who are elegantly psychotic."

"Bullshit, there's nothing elegant about you."

Janus, who was wearing a slim black suit with a yellow dress shirt and a bow tie and had his hair down and styled in soft waves, let out an offended gasp. "Excuse you, I am the epitome of elegance, thank you very much!"

"Yeah, don't diss Jan's taste in clothing," Virgil told him. "It's a fact that he's the most stylish out of all of us."

"You've dissed my taste in clothing multiple times, sweetcheeks."

Virgil rolled his eyes. "Okay, first of all, don't call me that, and second of all, that was back before I really got to know you. I don't diss your taste in clothing anymore."

"Hmm, true." Janus paused. "Wait, why did you emphasize 'clothing?'"

"I mean..." Virgil looked over at Remus, who was licking at a stain on his tie. "Your taste in men does leave something to be desired."

Janus smacked Virgil on the arm. "Say that again and I'll make you eat your own tongue."

"Okay, seriously, can we get back to the fact that I'm apparently the only one with sense?" Roman said. "How and why is Belos hot in your eyes? Emperor fucking Belos?"

Remus shrugged. "Already explained."

"Look, I'm not into girls, so I couldn't develop the crush on Eda that every girl-loving Owl House fan got," Virgil pointed out. "It's not my fault that Belos happens to look aesthetic as hell."

"Granted, for me, Matthew Rhys's voice did wonders," Janus said with a grin. "And anyone whose appearance is mildly unsettling is a win in my book."

Remus gave him a little smirk. "Oh, am I mildly unsettling, then?"

Janus made himself a little taller and kissed him on the cheek. "You're beautiful, my dear."

A smile flickered across Roman's face. "It's... it's really weird seeing you guys be openly affectionate here. Not bad-weird, obviously."