23) GROWING TENSION

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*Cody Walker's POV

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*Cody Walker's POV

Ian said it had nothing to do with me, but how could I possibly believe it when he had started acting weirdly as soon as he saw me?

The worst part was that I had absolutely no idea what I had done to make him like that. He had been fine yesterday at the diner and we had had fun — or at least that was what I thought. 

Maybe Ian felt like I had importuned him by asking if everything was okay, maybe he didn't want me that close, maybe he didn't trust me with his secrets. Maybe, after all, I was just in the group, because Ian pitied me and wanted me to think I have friends, when in reality we were nothing the kind.

We had a long run that day and I just put on some music isolating myself in my own world. I felt like shit, and even running didn't seem to help: my feet felt heavy, my breathing seemed to get stuck in my trachea and never reached my lungs or diaphragm, my shoelaces didn't want to stay tied up,..

On top of all, I felt a lump in my throat, not even realising it was because I was on the verge of tears. 

I don't know why it hurt so much, when I knew from the beginning that things would go sour sooner or later. I've known from the beginning not to open up too easily and to not have too high expectations. Yet, the thought of being left alone in the classroom and getting picked on by B, J & K again, felt too much to bear. 

Those three would never really leave me alone, I knew that, but they had kept it on minimum now that I had friends or "friends".

Then again, Ian had told me it had nothing to do with me. Should I try to trust him? Should I at least see if he still acted weirdly tomorrow? I wasn't ready to give up just yet, so I guess I would just have to keep showing up no matter what.

***

The next day, which was Thursday, Ian still behaved strangely. Although maybe not as much, so maybe there was still hope. I could see Ian was making an effort to ensure I wouldn't feel uncomfortable because of him. 

To make things a little more awkward, Ade wasn't at school today. If I understood correctly, his absence had something to do with helping around in his mom's store.

After lunch we had biology and Ian was my pair on a task we had to do. It was a small project that would be done by the end of the day, unlike the one we had when school had just started. We were free to leave the classroom and go as we wished, as long as the project got done by the end of the day.

We had chosen a corner from the second floor lobby, because it was cozy and there was a big sofa. I had snuggled on my spot comfortably and scribbled notes from an article I was reading. Ian sat on the sofa next to me and he was hunched so he could write in his notebook that was on the table.

"What have you done so far?" I leaned closer to Ian. I swear I wasn't doing anything like coming on to him — I didn't even touch him — but he almost jumped up from the sofa. I frowned and straightened my back, so that I wouldn't be so close to him.

"Not much." Ian said and handed his notebook to me. His handwriting wasn't very good, but it was readable.

"It's not bad actually." I just mumbled, doing my best to not show how his actions made me feel. It was better to act like I didn't notice or, even better, didn't care. 

"Really?" The corners of Ian's mouth turned up and he looked at me like I had just told him he was the mightiest person in the world. 

"Yeah." His enthusiasm made me feel even more confused and I could feel my face heating up, so I lowered my gaze quickly. 

Despite the tension between us — I felt like it was only growing and it bothered me — we got the task ready on time. 

***

Then it was Friday and yet again Oat was talking about the party. In my School survival guide was a chapter about parties as well. Or well, it wasn't really a chapter but a sentence: Never go to a party, not even if you're invited.

"I'm really not sure if I want to come." I was thinking about all the ways the evening would turn into a disaster.

"Of course you do." Oat said.

"I'm really not." I sighed. 

"Yes you are." Oat continued doggedly.

"No, I'm not." I shook my head.

"Let's have a race. If you win, you don't have to come. If I win, you can't say no." A sly smile spread on their lips. 

"Fine. I'll beat you with flying colors." I smirked back at them.

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