Is the truth better then a dare

A road to being friends

Sam watched Bucky eat a really big breakfast, which was unusual for him.

"Hey are you good?"

"I'm fine." Bucky said, trying to get as much energy stuffed in.

Bucky had started to become a lot more comfortable with Sam. It was only day 3 of their dare, but a lot had happened in those days.

Sam felt a lot more relaxed around Bucky, and didn't it didn't feel weird or tense. He knew Bucky was still hiding stuff but hopefully, one day Sam would grow to trust him and would tell him when he felt comfortable.

Natasha noticed the way Sam and Bucky didn't have that tension in between them and thought maybe her dare was actually working.

Then she realised that Bucky kept looking at Sam and was acting strangely loose.

She went over and dragged Bucky away to another room.

"Oh my god, you like Sam." She came right out with it.

"What? No I don't! Why would you think that?" Bucky said desperately trying to cover himself.

"I saw the way you were glancing at him. Bucky it's fine. It doesn't matter if you do, you just might have to tell him."

"Well I don't really know how much I like him, ok. I need to figure that out before I go about telling anyone."

"Oh my god you really do! I mean I was pretty sure but ahhh!" She said getting very excited.

"Shut up!" He said blushing.

Natasha giggled at him getting so flustered.

Bucky re entered the room, awfully quiet.

"Hey Buck, where were you?" Steve said, seeing him walked though the door.

"Just talking to Nat about something."

Steve looked down, feeling a bit hurt that he was telling Natasha stuff and not him.

Bucky saw the look and rolled his eyes, but in a direction so Bucky couldn't see, it happened to be Sam's direction.

Sam laughed at Bucky rolling his eyes at Steve.

Everyone just looked at him strange.

Bucky was so tired of Steve expecting him to always tell him everything. Although Bucky was getting used to Steve having other friends, Steve hated Bucky having others too, even though he wouldn't admit it. Sam noticed it too.

"Steve, please. I have other friends, like you. So deal with it." This time this wasn't because of his lack of energy.

Steve looked around but just stayed silent.

"Sorry." He peeped.
"It's fine." Bucky sighed.

Bucky took his coffee and sat outside.

He heard footsteps and prayed it wasn't Steve. His prayers were listened to. Sam sat next to him.

"I noticed it too. That he doesn't like you having other friends."

"Oh thank god, I hoped I wasn't the only one."

"I'm sure your not."

"I think he is used to be the only person in your life, like for a while it took you some time to get used to Steve's new life."

"I know, it just gets on my nerves that he acts like a victim all the time." Bucky didn't know why, but talking to Sam about this stuff seemed so natural. He knew he could trust Sam.

"Well maybe he will learn." Sam paused for a moment.

"If he saw us being friends, maybe he would be slightly ok with it." Bucky looked at him, slightly raised eyebrows.

"We're friends?"
"Well I'd like to think that's the way it's going."
"Yeah, me too." Bucky admitted, smiling slightly.

Sam caught his smile and it made him feel so warm and happy seeing him smile genuinely for once.

Natasha looked out the window and saw them talking and having a good time. This might have been the happiest she had seen Bucky, actually both of them. She smiled to herself.

Natasha knew that Bucky dealt with trauma, she had easily figured it out but hadn't pressured it out of him. She saw the fake smiles, and the forced energy. She saw it all. She had once been like that too. So seeing Bucky finally showing some signs of true happiness, it made her so glad.

Sam edged closer to Bucky, to talk to him.

"I guess cause we are friends now. I can tell you. This is something that I don't hide but I tell people I can trust. I'm gay."

"Thanks for trusting me Sam."

Sam nodded at him.

"How long have you known? If you don't mind me asking." Bucky asked curiously.

"Umm, I would say around 15 years old." How about you."

"Well I think I knew from a very young age, but I truly accepted it a couple of years ago."
He paused, thinking about whether to tell Sam.

"It was... really hard in the 40s. I think I had started to realise it but I was too scared to admit it to anyone. Even myself. I heard people talk about people getting beaten up because of it and um... there was an incident." Bucky felt a few tears form in his eyes and stopped.

Sam took his hand. Letting him know he was here for him.

"There was someone who was killed." Bucky managed to get out. Sam realised how damaging that must have been and how scared that would have made him of his sexuality.

"I am so sorry that you had to experience that. I can't even imagine how scared you must have felt." Bucky didn't say anything, but held onto Sam's hand tighter.

Bucky coughed "we uh, should go in now." He let go of Sam's hand and got up. They both went inside, both a little sad from what they talked about.

Bucky sat in the corner of the room trying to keep himself together. He fiddled with his hands, staring at the metal ones. He started falling into his self hatred pit again. He wish he could just burn the arm off.

He realised he wasn't alone so held back his tears and composed himself.

I'm ok.
I'm fine.
Get over it.

He thought to himself.

Sam felt so much sadness for Bucky. He had clearly been through so much, and he wasn't even letting on all of it.

He understand the denying his sexuality, but definitely not to the extent that Bucky did.

Sam was glad though that they had started to become friends. Seeing Bucky smile, made his whole world better. He wished Bucky was always that happy.

Sam really wanted to make that happen, I mean his smile made him he look so cute.

Oh god.

This wasn't happening. He didn't just call Bucky Barnes cute. He mentally face palmed. He hoped these feelings would just disappear.