After All This Time

I Don't Want to Let Go

"Bargaining is your mind's way of pushing off reality. If you allow your loss to sink in, you admit that it's real and final."

Erika Krull

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"Mom?" Eli called, seeing a blonde woman standing by a lake.

"Hey, honey." Kathy replied softly, smiling as her son walked over to her.

"What's going on? Why are we here? Why am I here?" He asked, confused as he looked at his surroundings before turning his gaze back to his mother.

"We didn't get to say goodbye. This is our chance." Kathy explained softly, watching the light breeze move through the trees and over the water gently.

"What is this place?" Eli asked, turning his gaze to the water.

Kathy smiled lightly as she walked over to a bench a few feet away and sat down; Eli following behind her. "Your dad and I used to come here with his parents when we were in high school. He loved it here." She whispered, her voice cracking slightly at the end.

"How are you here? I don't understand." Eli spoke softly as tears formed in his eyes.

"I go wherever my heart takes me. It took me here." Kathy explained, smiling softly.

Eli nodded slightly and paused for a moment before speaking again. "I miss you so much." He whispered, a single tear making its way down his cheek.

Kathy turned to look at her son, smiling lightly and wiping the tear from his face gently. "I miss you, too, sweetheart. And your sisters and your brother and your dad. But I'll always be with you guys, right here." She whispered, gently resting her hand on his chest, over his heart.

"But it's not the same." Eli whispered back, slow tears streaming steadily down his cheeks now.

"I know, honey. But you just have to remember that I'll always be with you. No matter what." Kathy reassured him as tears formed in her eyes. "I love you, Eli."

"I love you, too, Mom." Eli responded, wrapping his arms around his mother as she embraced him.

They spent a few moments in silence after they pulled back from the hug, watching the wind flow through the trees and over the water, then Kathy spoke up. "It's time for you to go back now, sweetheart." She whispered, trying not to cry again.

"But I don't wanna go back. I wanna stay here with you." Eli protested, tears forming in his eyes once again.

"I know, but you have to. Everyone will miss you if you don't go back. It'll be okay, honey, I promise." Kathy whispered, running her fingers through her son's hair as he laid his head on her shoulder.