trigger warnings: repetition, suffocation, dying, depersonalization, compulsive reading, feeling sick, families, shootings
--
green, green, green
eyesight blurring
blurring and fogging and
everything's falling
I'm falling and I'm hurting
gasping for breath
grabbing for my brother, for my friends
it's the end
the end of my days
everything's a haze
fighting for my life
as if it's worth my life
can't save yourself without dying first
force against you, against the current
clawing for a handhold
fighting with my eyes closed
reformation
endless process
change yourself to save the promise
the premise is different from the end of the work
the end of the work is the end of the world
I've read things I hate
I'm reading things I hate
they make me feel gross
sick, have a fit
laughing and crying and laughing fits
scaring my family, where'd I learn to laugh like that
writer's block
writing and then stop
I wrote a letter
then lost it in my head
can't hold my words for long
hold them or you're dead
bang bang, run for your life
hands over your ears
hold on tight
hold on and hold on and spit in their face
force out the thoughts
hide your eyes
lock the doors
climb out the windows
run from the sounds, we're all going down
it's a dream, it's a dream
they're not who they seem
not what it feels like
it's all a dream
— Tim, Jay, & Unknown.
