Scarlett Johansson | One-Shots (1)

NR - Graham Cracker

This entire one-shot is an easter egg. Have fun.
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Callie:
Sitting in my home office, I stare blankly at my computer screen. I'm supposed to be doing work for SHIELD but instead, I've decided that the little gnat crawling on the screen is much more interesting. I don't think I've blinked in a good while but I can't remember. In my blurred peripheral vision, I see my office door open and someone walks in. I'm suddenly snapped out of staring blankly when my laptop is shut. I look up to my wife placing a cup of hot tea on my desk with a sweet smile.

"You probably killed it," I deadpan, taking a sip of tea.

"Killed what? Your computer?" Nat asks.

"No. The bug."

"Right. Sorry. How are you feeling?"

"Tired. I'd love to take a nap right about now."

"Me too."

"Can we take a nap?"

Nat pauses to consider my offer. I guess she likes it so she says, "For a bit."

I happily trudge into the bedroom, dragging Nat with me. We get comfortable in each other's arms and quickly fall asleep.

-

I gradually wake up to the sound of continuous vibrations. Groaning under my breath, I roll out of Natasha's arms to search the crumpled sheets for whoever's phone is going off. Finally, I find my phone and the name of Greyson's daycare shows on the screen.

"Hello?" I try to sound as awake as possible.

The sweet woman on the other side tells me I need to get to the daycare immediately so I hang up and scramble out of bed.

"Cal?" Nat asks, clearly annoyed that I'm no longer in her arms.

"The, uh, daycare called. I have to go."

"Is everything okay?"

"I'll find out."

-

Natasha:
Almost an hour later, the front door opens. I make my way out of the kitchen and I'm greeted by our one-year-old son in Callie's arms.

"So what happened? Why do you have him?" I ask.

"Apparently..." Callie steps up to me. "Our little rascal punched someone named Harrison."

I drop my smile and turn my attention to Grey. "You punched a child?" I ask him and he just coos.

"According to the sweet woman at the front desk, there was a graham cracker involved."

"Over a graham cracker?"

"They said they want us to talk to him." Callie hands Greyson to me, pecks my cheek, and walks away. I follow.

"He's 12 months. What do they expect us to do, give him a lecture on non-violent conflict resolution?" I chuckle.

Callie cracks a smile. "I don't know, hun."

"Our son punches other children!" I bounce Grey in my arms even though I'm not happy with him and I can't believe he punched a kid.

"Over a graham cracker!" Callie calls from somewhere with a laugh.

I turn to Greyson in my arms and make my way upstairs, talking to him the whole time. "When you're upset, you don't punch other kids. There are better ways to handle your conflict," I tell him in my talking to babies voice. In a normal voice, I continue. "I personally don't think graham crackers are worth getting kicked out of daycare for."

As I'm walking back out of my wife and I's bedroom, Callie's figure standing in the doorway spooks me. "Are you talking to him?"

"Oh, just giving him the non-violent conflict resolution speech."

Callie chuckles. "We're lucky Dallas never punched a kid at daycare. Or anywhere."

"Only one of our kids is violent at daycare. Lucky us."

I set down Grey and he plops down at my feet, fidgeting with my pants. Callie steps up to me and puts her hands on my collarbones. She flattens my slightly wrinkled shirt. I think she might give me some sort of speech about how we have to teach our kids better but instead, she stops her hands on my collar and kisses me. She then leaves the room. I'm left with a smile on my lips as I stare down at our kid at my feet.