Dear Sim Jaeyun ⚊ Letter Series #3 ✔

letter three

Dear Sim Jaeyun,

These past two weeks have been hard for me, what will all the girls trying to convince me for them to join our tutoring sessions for each end of the school days.

But at least you were there to help me, to tell them off that it makes me uncomfortable if there's too many people in one place and only then did they go away.

I admired you for that, for the long patience you have with them even if some of them stayed from the other tables near us inside the Library.

They were all watching you in the way I did. In my case, it was like a stalker hiding in the corners and would die if I got caught.

I must say that you are improving rather quickly and it scares me because it would me all those days of being with you alone would be shorten.

So far I still like, you always smiled at me a few times in those quiet hours between us and it often caught me off-guard, making me look away to hide my blush.

You seemed to be aware of your long lasting effect on me, and I can't help it when you were so close, with only the table that was keeping you separate for me to touch.

But I loved it whenever you talked about small things in your day, I love when I look at your eyes looking at me in our awkward conversations, I love your pink lips and of course, your beautiful soft hair.

You have control over so many people and you don't even notice it, not aware of how much power you have, so I give you credit for that.

I remember when our hands brushed for the first time at the time you asked me to check your essay, tingles ran from my fingers up to the hairs in my neck and it thundered all around my nerves until it reached my heart.

I could go on to be frozen, but I don't want to make you see how intense your touch is to my skin.

It did make me wonder how you feel in those moment. But you didn't seemed to notice, more enthralled by the way you bragged about how you were much good when it comes to math.

I remember our fourth session, you laughed at one of my jokes about our bald teacher who is chubby as well. I told you if one where to push him, he'll just bounce around like a ball and you couldn't help but let out a chuckle.

I smiled at your delightful laugh, all this time I only heard you sent it to your friends and the others who were close to you, so that time I only wanted to fall in love with you more.

In our sixth session, you seemed to be sick. You were unusually quiet and you're sneezing from time to time. I wanted to ask you why if you were okay, but I didn't because I don't want to seem nosy.

But then I just caught a glimpse in your eye that you were close to crying.

It looked like you got sick because of something. You soon stopped looking at me and told me that you had to leave without saying why, you didn't let me ask questions because you refused to look in my eyes, as if you were hiding something from me.

I forgot the other times I caught you spacing out because usually, you look pretty normal. There were times when we would take a break from studying at one hour when I would catch you zoning out.

You would just stare at the windows, and watched the leaves flutter carefully down the grounds, as if you were waiting for someone to come.

I would do the same until an airplane flies by in the sky, making me recognized what you were thinking about.

I knew you were looking forward to leave Australia, without knowing that someone else would be heartbroken at your leave, but what can I do? I'm just nothing to you, Jake.

I can't deny that I'm worried for the next year to come with the knowledge that I would enter the halls of this school again for the last of my highschool years but that time, there would be no you walking in.

I can't wait to leave and graduate from this school, and not have to worry about my hopeless crush anymore.

And you know, maybe it would be me not feeling anything by the next time we see each other again.

Sincerely yours,
Y/N L/N