Sneakers over heels #Wattys2021

Chapter forty one

“Please make sure you don’t stress yourself Ms. Drakeyer.” The doctor orders as he takes the ventilator off my face. I only nod as a response waiting for him to leave soon. Taking my lack of engagement in a conversation as a sign of me not wanting him there, he leaves with the nurse.
 
“Are you alright?” Ava comes rushing into my room with a horror-struck face. She was sweating profusely and her lips were pale.
 
Just how bad did I look to get such an expression from her?
 
“I’m alright.” I croak and scratch my throat feeling the itchiness. Ava quickly grabs me a glass of water and helping me sit up, hands me the glass. I take in huge gulps feeling the fresh liquid run down my parched throat.
 
“Better?”
 
“Yeah. Thanks, honey.” To this, she smiles brightly and I chuckle lightly.
 
“What happened all of a sudden?”
 
“I don’t know. It just felt suffocating and got difficult to breathe.”
 
Ava sits on the bed and massages my arm gently with a forlorn look plastered on her face. Lifting my other hand, I flick her forehead and she stares at me in shock.
 
“Stop looking like the dead. I’m fine.”
 
“I was just so-”
 
She’s cut off when the door to the room blasts open and at the doorway stands a breathless dad.
 
“Judith!” his loud voice resonates across the room. He rushes to my side with a worried look and my heart pains for the man. “Are you alright? I heard you went into shock.”
 
I take his hand in mine and give it a squeeze. “I’m fine Dad. Just got a little out of breath.” He doesn’t take my words to heart and continues looking me all over the face for any signs of distress. I roll my eyes at him and the small gesture softens his gaze.
 
The awkward human being standing just beside my Dad fidgets on her feet. Her presence is finally acknowledged by Dad and he stares at her surprised.
 
“Avangeline.”
 
“Hey, Uncle Jack.” She chuckles awkwardly feeling embarrassed all of a sudden.
 
“I see you finally visited.” He was only teasing but his words somehow hurt Ava. I hit him on the side and he looks at me confused. I glare at the man and he realizes his mistake. Gently patting Ava on the head he gives her a warm smile.
 
“Judith may push me aside. But she would never do
so to you. Please stay by her side?”
 
“Of course!” Ava’s yell was most likely heard by the entire emergency department.
 
“Go back to the gym. You’re only making the two of us feel embarrassed.” I complain and he chuckles lightly at that. With a soft kiss on the crown of my head, Dad promises to be back soon and leaves.
 
As soon as he’s out of the room, Ava pounces on the bed and lies down beside me. We both remain silent and just enjoy each other’s company.
 
Ava swings her legs back and forth and her feet jabs into my foreleg.
 
“Oh! Sorry I didn’t-”
 
“I didn’t feel a thing, Ava. It’s fine.” I force the words out with a thin smile and her expression is crestfallen.
 
She doesn’t say anything and plays with her fingers.
 
“It’s so weird.” She breaks the silence.
 
“What is?”
 
“You being in one place. You’re always too busy running around, it was always difficult getting a hold of you. Now that you’re just beside me with no practices to get to or exercises to get done, it just feels weird.”
 
“If I was able to walk, I would have left this darn place already.” I sigh. “Forget that. Tell me what’s been happening at school? With the-” I pause before saying the next word. “Hawkettes?”
 
“I’m not sure. I rarely see the girls. Occasionally Tori comes up to me asking about you but I always ran away.”
 
“I guess now that the games are out of the way, the seniors are preparing to graduate.”
 
“The sports channel had been over the moon after the Hawkettes victory.” Ava changes the topic. This picks my interest and I turn to her for more details. “There were so many interviews. The captain appeared a lot. I think she’s gotten a lot of scholarships to sports colleges-” Ava carries on but I zone out.
 
Senora has got a scholarship. That’s great.
 
I close my eyes for a moment and sigh deeply feeling a sense of contentment wash over me.
 
“Hey, are you listening to me?”
 
“I am. Go on.” She pouts slightly for my lack of concentration but then gets back to talking.
 
“The boys' basketball team has been crazy.”
 
“Why?”
 
“They always try to ambush me after class. Especially Luca Dowaine. God, I never knew he could be such a pest! Like why can’t they just visit
you? Why go through me?”
 
“Because I’ve been ignoring them.”
 
“Why?”
 
“I don’t feel like seeing any of them. Or my girls.”
 
My girls.
 
“I’m sure the girls miss you, Judy.”
 
I wonder.
 
My eyes well up in tears once more and I close them to stop the tears. I had wanted to play for the Hawkettes until I graduated. I wanted to be with the girls in more games. I wanted to be a Hawkette until the very end.
 
I’ve lost my team. I’ve lost my love. And I’ve lost my purpose in life.
 
“Hang on a minute Mom,” my eyes open wide and I look to my side at Ava. She’s on the phone and turns to me. She mouths a few words and after my nodding leaves the room for a moment. I was all alone once more.
 
I’ve always been alone. I’ve always loved the loneliness. So why does it feel so frightening now?
 
Without a moment's waste as if in a trance, I pick my phone and dial a number I’d memorized by heart.
 
One ring and the line connects.
 
I don’t speak a word and neither does the person on the other side. As the silence continues I realize just what I’d done. Hurriedly I take the phone away from my ear and am about to press the red end button when the voice from the other side stops me.
 
“Jude?”
 
My insides turn and my heart felt like it was going under an attack. How long has it been since I felt this way?
 
“Judy?”
 
I stifle a cry at the call of my name.
 
“Judith, I know you’re there. Talk to me. Please.” I’d never heard his voice sound so broken. So tired.
 
“Tray?” I whisper into the phone, my voice breaking. I hear the loud sucking of breath and the sound of a nervous laugh.
 
“Oh god. Judy,” It felt like he was in tears. And so was I.
 
“Where are you? I need to see you.” The desperation was so clear in my voice. I hear the sound of something crashing and then the loud footsteps that follow. Travis doesn’t say another word and I stare at my phone in horror wondering if he had thrown his phone away upon my request.
 
I’m a fool.
 
The door is suddenly thrown open and an out-ofbreath Travis, with messy clothes and uncombed locks of hair, stood by the entrance. His eyes were bloodshot and his face looked tired and almost lifeless.
 
A sob escapes my lips and I let the tears fall freely without restrictions.
 
I try to get to my feet and run to him. But I can’t. I extend my arms and he runs to me throwing his arms over me engulfing me in a hug. I cover my face in his clothes basking in his scent and cry my heart out.
 
I wail aloud, letting the pain take over. My heart ached and I felt suffocated.
 
All the while Travis holds on to me like he was never letting go.
 
“I’ve lost my legs. I’ve lost my legs, Travis.” I keep repeating the same words over and over again. Travis pulls me closer to him, patting my back soothingly.
 
“You’re going to be fine Judy. I know you will.”
 
“I’ll never be able to walk anymore. I’ll never be able to play-” I couldn’t get the rest of the words out.
Something felt like it was blocking my throat.
 
I have always maintained a calm composure around Travis. I have never shown him my broken side and yet now I am shamelessly crying in front of him.
 
I am broken beyond repair. And all I could do was cry.
 
“Who cares if you can’t walk? I’ll carry you.” He says with force pulling me back and glaring into my eyes. “Don’t give up just yet Judith. We’ll get through this together. You’re not alone.”
 
How could I have ever thought I would do well without him?
 
Travis was vital in my life. I cannot survive without him.
 
“I wanted to go out with you more. I can’t walk now. I can’t even sit myself up without the support of someone.”
 
Travis pulls me back into his arms and my cries get muffled as my face is covered. He keeps shushing me but it only makes me want to cry out more.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for ever hurting you Judy. I was a fool to have asked you such a question. I didn’t know what was happening. I just got so furious with Mom and I-” he stops, clenching his fists to control himself.
 
“Perhaps if I had chosen you when you asked me to” before I could continue Travis slaps both my cheeks. Hard.
 
“Stop that! Don’t you dare say another word. Please don’t make me feel any guiltier than I already am.” Hurt and frustration clearly visible in his eyes. “The Judith I knew chased her dream headstrong. She would never say such a thing. My Judith will continue pursuing her dreams even if the world stood against her. That strong girl is the one I love.”
 
At once I stop and stare at him.
 
My breathing stops. My heart stops. Literally, everything in me stops as his words sink into my brain.
 
“What did you say?” My words leave my cold lips in a painful whisper. Travis cups my face in his hands and brings his face close to mine.
 
“I love you, Judith. I have always loved you.”
A tear trickles down my cheek as I hear the very words I have always yearned for. My heart which had started racing a mile comes to an abrupt stop as a realization befalls me.
 
I love Travis. Yet I couldn’t say the words out. He would surely think I was using him when I was in a desperate situation.
 
The regret of pushing my confession aside to be done after the match haunts me. Crushing the sheets beneath my palms I stare at an empty space unable to look him in the eye.
 
Am I destined to be miserable?
 
“I know your feelings, Judith.”
 
“What?”
 
“When Ava wanted me to come watch the final game she had to tell me the truth to get me out of my room. She told me everything.”
 
I finally look up at the boy in front of me and the breath that was caught up escapes my lips.
 
How could someone so precious ever bother with someone like me?
“I... I can’t walk anymore. I can’t... P-play. I’m nothing without basketball. I’m a nobody now. Why did you have to confess now?”
 
His gentle gaze hardens.
 
“I didn’t fall in love with the girl who plays basketball. I didn’t fall in love with your legs. I love you, Judith. Plain and simple you. The reckless girl who’s arrogant, smart, and annoying to be around with. The girl who makes my heart swell. I love you and you alone for who you are.”
 
I search his face trying to find any clue that he was kidding. That he wasn’t being serious. But his eyes, the gentle olive green eyes I love, stare at me with a determinant look full of affection. The same Travis I’ve always known.
 
I push myself forward and hug Travis tight. My eyes sting with unshed tears and I wail my heart out in pain. He just stands there patting my back, encouraging me to let it all out.
 
“I like you, Travis. I love you.” I whisper to him and he gives me the gentlest smile he could muster.
 
I was never the type to cling on to someone. To want anyone to stay in my life if they weren’t willing to.
 
But for the first time, I was being desperate to cling on to someone.
 
I didn’t want to lose Travis at all costs. 
 
“Please don’t push me away.”
 
“I would never Jude. You’re my only one.”
 
He grasps my hand tightly in his and placed it on his face as he leans in placing his forehead on mine.
 
“I love you Judith Drakeyer.”
 
Travis pulls my face close to his and plants a soft kiss on my trembling lips.