I DO NOT OWN HELLSING ULTIMATE NOR HELLSING ULTIMATE ABRIDGED
After the last episode ended everyone was talking about it. "Did you see what happened! Corsac shot like, PEW-PEW-PEW and then Alucard went I'm going to eat you, gobble-gobble-gobble!" Ruby spoke animatedly. "Yeah, I can't wait for the next episode!" Yang yelled pumping her fist up and down.
BEFORE WE BEGIN
Everyone looked up and what was going to happen? Suddenly a gold orb pulled itself from the screen and positioned itself on one of the seats. The gold orb POPPED!
And fell out a young boy with dark skin wearing farmer's clothes. His body fell onto the seat and slumped down. A line of drool from flowing from his mouth signifying that he was out. Everyone looked at the boy curiously before his eyes start to open. He looked around and said "Oh, I'm here already" "you knew you were coming here?" Ozpin asked or more like stated.
Oscar nodded "The disembodied voice gave me all the information," he said "and what might your name be, young man?", "Oscar, Oscar Pines" Ozpin's eyes widened at that 'could he be...?'
WHILE I LIKE HEARING ABOUT OUR NEW GUEST THE EPISODE'S ABOUT TO BEGIN
Everyone looked at the screen to see it was indeed starting up.
FENNEC: The following is a fan-based parody. Hellsing Ultimate is property of Kouta Hirano and Studio Madhouse...? The fuck is this?! You assholes brought me back from the dead to read this legal bullshit?! No no no no no no. FUCK. THAT! If I'm gonna come back to life to read a fucking line, then it's gonna be my kind of fucking line.
"Oh god," Winter said pinching her nose in annoyance. "Why is this guy doing the disclaimer!" Weiss yelled.
(Clears throat)
My THROBBING VAMPIRE DICK is a fan-based parody. Its SHAFT, BALLS and SCROTUM are property of me, FENNEC ALBAIN. And whatever bitch I happen to be giving it to at the time. Please support MY DICK by helping with its official release. You know you want to...
"Uh, no I don't think so," Yang said in disgust "Why what did he say?" Ruby asked, she didn't hear because her father and mother were covering her ears and eyes with her cloak "You don't need to know" Summer said uncovering Ruby's head.
(flashback)
"Whoa what is this place?" Nora asked looking at the setting. "It seems to be some type of war" Ironwood replied. "War?" Blake asked Ozpin nodded he knew the signs of a battlefield and this was one.
NICHOLAS HELLSING: Vampire king...
"Grandpa Nick?!" Weiss and Winter shouted looking at the man who had Alucard by the collar. "Wait?" Yang looked at the screen to look at the man who defeated Alucard "That guy is your grandfather?" she yelled. "More importantly" Nora cut in "did you hear what he said?" Everyone looked at her "He called Fearless Leader, Vampire King!" Nora shouted, "Which means Jauney's king of the castle, Jauney's king of the castle!" Nora sang. "Wait, look!" Ruby cut in, the screen showed Jaune bloody and bruised "It seems the Vampire king has been defeated" Weiss said with a smirk.
ALUCARD: (groaning)
NICHOLAS HELLSING: You lay upon ze blood-soaked dirt of your ruined land. Castles plundered... dominions in ruin... servants destroyed - all to end ze hellfire wis which you sought to cover ze world. A bloody conquest having consumed hundreds of thousands, countless villages razed to ze ground, and over 20,000 impaled and prostrated by you and you alone to strike horror into the hearts of mortal men! Vhat say you, monster, demon, devil conceived by the bleakest womb?! WHAT SAY YOU NOW?!
