OSCAR: Ze following is a fan-based parody. Hellsing Ultimate is owned by Kouta Hirano and Studio Madhouse, and is licenced by Geneon, Madman Entertainment, Manga Entertainment, and Funimation. Please support ze official release.
"Huh so I'm doing the disclaimer now" Oscar exclaimed.
FANG: Please, no! I'll worship your Go-
CARDIN: [kills him with his bayonet] Ha...!
"Cardin, I think you're having too much fun killing them," Yang said apprehensively.
COCO: I zhink zat was ze last one. Good zhing, too. I fear you're running out of bayonets.
CARDIN: Care to correct yourself?
COCO: [empties guns] S-sorry, sir! You have bayonets for days!
CARDIN: Bayonets for days.
"Oh, come on! How is he intimidating me!?" Coco roused.
"Probably because I'm a badass" Cardin replied.
Coco looked back at Cardin.
"You are not a badass," she said.
"This me is," He said pointing at the screen.
SKY LARK: Father Cardin, I believe I speak for all of us when I ask: Why did we go out of our way to save this... [camera points at Weiss] Erh...
"Woman," Weiss said while Yang tried to hide her giggling to herself.
WEISS: Woman.
SKY: I didn't want to assume.
WEISS: I was actually wondering that myself. Alucard would have left Russel to die. Probably after putting a bullet in his leg.
"That does sound like him," She said.
CARDIN: I am a man of three things: God, virtue, and disobeying that tramp Russel when it suits me! And if I'd let the woman die, I'd have been none of the three!
"Oh god, that means... he's just like Jaune," Weiss said facepalming.
WEISS: Wait, so... you just defy your master's orders on a whim?
CARDIN: [cheerfully] Aye!
WEISS: ...Good God, it's strange to see this from the outside.
"It really is," Weiss said answering her counterpart.
[series logo appears, behind it flies a zeppelin and a scene goes to the bridge/command center inside]
CAPTAIN: Lieutenant Ilia Amolita, ve are just outside ze Hellsing perimeter. Ve shall maintain zhis position as ve observe- [interrupted by Ilia]
ILIA: No! All hands to battle stations.
CAPTAIN: But... Ma'am... Our orders-
Zorin: I have been vaiting for zhis var for over fifty years. I have been given veapons, men, AND a target. I vill not be cockblocked to the point of entry by that little red toad! I... no, VE vill get vhat ve have coming to us. Now Captain, launch ze V-1s!
