if i die tomorrow - permanent hiatus

children

A/N: The truth comes out this chapter. Brace y'allselves. It's ugly. But so much fun to write.

     I hissed as I accidentally walked through a tree.

     Its seemingly sturdy trunk dissipated into a fine mist as I touched it, then immediately reformed when I was through. I shivered, discromfort vibrating under my skin. 

     The world wasn't complete enough for me to walk it for too long. I had to hurry.

     And yet, I couldn't stop myself from looking around, endlessly comparing the pictures seared into my mind with this world of peace. Could this only have been less than two decades ago?

     From the moment I was old enough to remember, I had been training for war. Talk of Calamity Ganon surrounded my childhood, woven through my earliest memories. I wondered at the stark contrast. 

     Did they know yet of Calamity Ganon's imminent return? Did they know that their world would be burnt to ashes within 18 years?

     I shook my head. No more. I had to reach Hyrule Castle. 

     People of flourishing towns walked right past me, sometimes straight through me, without batting an eye. I trudged through the crowded streets, the first brushes of night stroking the pavement, fighting hard not to walk into someone. Although, I needn't have bothered. It was as though I was invisible. 

     Perhaps I was. Perhaps, to this world, I did not exist.

     So was I incapable of changing history, as I was now? 

     The thought brought with it a suffocating sense of finality. No matter what happened, I was powerless to stop it, to change its course. My only role here was to learn, and to accept. 

     I sighed. At least it would make it easier for me to sneak around this way.

     It didn't take me as long as I expected to reach Hyrule Castle. 

     I stopped at its gates. The guards didn't respond as I walked right past them, through the closed double doors. 

     Then I was in. As easy as that. 

     I was surprised at how little change there had been. Yes, the gardens looked vastly different, and there seemed to be some sort of construction going on around the back of the Castle, where I assumed the stables were. Otherwise, it looked almost exactly the same. 

     I bit my lip. The towers reached up to the deepening evening sky, tickled the shadows of stars beginning to wink into existence. 

     Last chance to back out. 

     My left hand scrunched into a fist. 

     If I didn't have the courage to face myself, then what good was I?

     I walked through the gardens, fire smoldering in my heart. The hems of my tunic -- the one Sadie had given me -- fluttered in the sudden gust of wind. Blooming flowers of every colour swayed in their quiet, ephemeral beauty. The paved path beneath my boots made no noise as I passed.

     The whispering of the warm breeze by my ears, for some reason, made me feel colder. I walked on.

     The dull murmur of the last batch of servants for the day remained unbroken as I walked amongst them, a nonexistent intruder. I recognized none of them. I wove through them, my head hanging, surrounded by people, but lonelier than ever. 

     I stepped straight through the Castle walls. Gray mist clung to my skin as I burst out into the ghost of a castle, within one of its innumerable halls.