To My Youth [BL]

[20] The Next Page (2/2)

The moment that question left Gu Xiao's mouth, he wanted to hit his head against a wall and dig his own grave. When Lan Yuning heard those words, his eyes widened, and his grip on his jacket stiffened.

"I don't."

Gu Xiao's eyes wandered around the bus in embarrassment, landing anywhere except past Lan Yuning's side.

Strangely, hearing those words cleared this murky fog in his chest, though he still wanted to punch He Rong just once, and He Rong probably wanted to do the same to him too.

It had nothing to do with the past, but he simply wanted to do it because of his stupid jealousy.

"So... you remember?" Lan Yuning asked, and Gu Xiao nodded.

"Not everything though, since I never paid that much attention to him."

"Do you find me strange? I must have been a laughing stock."

This question wasn't a new one suddenly confronting him; they were old familiar aches.

It was long since this topic arose, and the question regarding whether it was strange or not once again wrung Gu Xiao's heart.

This present anguish relating to this topic had waxed and gathered strength, it matured and concentrated, until it had taken the form of a fearful, frenzied and fantastic question, which tortured his heart and mind, clamouring insistently for an answer.

"No, you are not strange. It must have been hard for you during that time, but try not to let whatever He Rong did or what Wang Xing said get to you, okay? Both of them just enjoy being up in other people's businesses because they're not satisfied with their own lives."

Looking around at the people on the bus, the same scene and thoughts from a long time ago swam up.

Some people lived lavishly but still suffered bitterly, while some people had nothing but lived comfortably.

Some people were blind in love, while some people were blind in sight.

Some people climbed tall buildings to watch the moon, while some climbed to take a step forwards and jump. Just so that the people who wronged them would live with this inscrutable guilt of committing murder. Yet, the person was unaware that the people who turned a blind eye were still not speaking.

In the end, humans were all just something insignificant in this world. They were dead as dust.

"He Rong and I. We were more than friends," Gu Xiao said.

Lan Yuning's face blanked out, and Gu Xiao could tell his mind was probably unable to comprehend those words. After all, even Zhang Yongyin was shocked when he found out too, though he gets shocked by a lot of minor things, so it probably didn't mean much.

It had been so long since he spoke about his relationship with He Rong that all he could do was let out a sigh and lean back, allowing his exhaustion to drift along with the passing clouds.

"His father might have gotten remarried since my mother passed away. It must be confusing," Gu Xiao chuckled.

Gu Xiao's mind sunk into a hollow space, and he turned to Lan Yuning, who was looking at him wholly, as though all his attention was on listening to everything he had to say.

There was something about Lan Yuning's presence that made him put his guard down completely. That Gu Xiao knew what he was going to do next would either be his worst mistake or be something that would lift the violence that he constantly exacted towards himself.

"He Rong was my stepbrother."