written in the stars | yjw

06 | petrichor

CHAPTER SIX

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two parts. | long chapter.

the cotton texture from the newly bought mattress succumbs the boy to lay in supine, both eyes meeting contact with the empty ceiling. miniature light fixtures were only up there, no glow-in-the-dark star stickers nor hologram constellations. he find himself contemplating over anything. it goes too random — in the midnight.

it's the train of thought, jungwon wonders.

his mind rolls over the memory lane, unconciously reminiscing of his ingenuous youth. he had his friends back then, it formed a circle with four members. the way he spent his high school like those wild youths wasting their nights away, typical ice cream dates with anyone, those drunk-dazed events he went from sneaking out and even countless occurences he chose to remember. of course, the memories roll like a movie — eventually approaching another act or scene where he and seoyoon met for the first time.

yet, he couldn't resist the temptation of reliving, no matter how much he wished to forget it, to fall into the pit of oblivion, it's incurable. it's the mind that outsmarts him, those memories, it's eternally recorded.

apart from his reliving sessions, he moves himself away from the matress and hardly crosses over the bathroom when he felt something unusual in his body activity. it makes his heart pound slowly, a gradual, slightest pain crawls on his lower leg, preferably in his bones, summing up the trivial changes in his skin. he heaves a relieved sigh upon checking himself on the mirror, focusing on his face and there was none.

no changes at all.

the next morning, jungwon leaves the house with a tiny leather slingbag hanging on his shoulders and heads his way to the park. he intentionally left his typewriter at home and decides to do something fun for today.

he goes to the lake that was facing south against the gazebo he used to rest himself and pulls out his checkered picnic mantle to lay it down under the shade of willow tree together with the journal that yuna bought for him.

the boy carefully crouches himself down to the cotton fabric and calmly exhales upon gazing the broad view of crystal-clear lake. there were swans wafting across the rippling water being surrounded by abundant meadows, his expression softens and continues to wander while sitting. then, he grabs the journal and begins to write something on the fourth page.

those reliving sessions had brought him to write a verse as nostalgia drowned his senses of being aware of the present. he can't yet fathom what he was feeling, but his heart gives him the hint of missing, loss, and regret. it's still shallow, but it makes its way to deepen and feel it afterwards.

it's a vintage film rolling,
cold lights were passing.
it plays tainted memories,
still wondering how it ends,
yet the same, has no changes.
no wonder it takes all one take.

the words were being jotted down by his running hand, his stream of consciousness was active and functioning effectively, not surprising. the first verse was completely written under seven minutes by just glancing back and forth from the lake back to his journal but something was partly bothering him.

jungwon seems unsatified of his work, looking at the verse looks like it needed more, just another stanza with six lines again. it feels like he was writing a self-composed lyrics with a hint of nostalgia embedded on each lines. well, it must be kind of his side hobby, along with writing poetries. he then straighten his back to keep on writing until he pleases himself.