Till The End

19

Warnings:
-Mentions amputation/surgery
-Mentions chemotherapy

George's POV

I was crying softly when I laid in my bed because of the absolute exhaustion and pain. Sapnap was sitting next to my bed after everything that just happened with Clay and held my hand shortly.

'The doctor is coming with results from your scan yesterday, but I figure you can sleep first. You look exhausted.'

'I have too much pain to sleep,' I whispered as I grabbed my panda to hold it tight. 'Sap, I'm afraid that the cancer is going to win this time. I haven't felt this bad in ages, not even when I had cancer the first time.'

'Don't lose hope, okay?' Sapnap immediately answered.

'I think I might either die or lose my leg,' I sobbed. 'I don't want either of those. I'd rather lose my leg obviously, but I don't want that either.'

Sapnap sat closer to my bed and started rubbing my head softly. 'Close your eyes,' he whispered with a voice crack. I knew he was about to cry and I closed my eyes as he softly rubbed my head to make me feel tired enough to fall asleep.

I was so exhausted that even though I was dying because of the pain, I still fell asleep.

~~~

I woke up hours later, still with the most pain I ever had, and I looked up at my doctor, parents and Sapnap in the room. My parents visited me a lot, but I was still happy every time I saw them when I woke up.

'How are you feeling, honey?' my mother asked.

'Really bad,' I whispered. 'I'm so tired and sick and my leg hurts so much.'

'I'm so sorry, sweetheart,' my mother sighed. 'I love you.'

'I love you too,' I mumbled. 'I miss Clay. He understands me and it makes me very upset that he's not here with me right now. I think I'm going to cry.' I was too tired to realise what I was saying.

My mother gave me a tight hug. 'That's totally fine. Clay is coming back in a week, sweetie.'

'Okay,' I sniffed as I looked at the doctor, not realising he had been here all this time. 'Oh, hello.'

'I'm here to discuss the results with you,' he confirmed, sitting down on a chair as he looked at his papers and then to us. 'It's not too good.'

'Am I dying?' I whispered, trying to fight against my tears.

The doctor didn't answer and then took a deep breath. 'Your leg is full of cancer and at this point it's so bad that we can't save it anymore. I'm sorry to say that you will need your leg to get amputated. The cancer is spreading really quickly and thanks to the chemo, it hasn't spread further than to your lungs, arm and leg.'

I didn't hear anything of what he said but the word "amputated". I was so tired that I immediately bursted out into tears as I hugged all my stuffed animals and curled myself up.

My mother came closer to me to hold me tightly and kissed my cheek, looking at the doctor. 'Will the cancer be gone after that?'

'We are going to amputate his knee. With a rare surgery, we put his under leg backwards against the top part which causes his foot to serve as a knee. We will get him a prosthetic leg which will, after rehabilitation, cause him to be able to do most things in his life again. There are cancer cells in his shins, but we will remove this with surgery and a few extra chemo sessions if he's not too weak.'

I couldn't stop crying anymore and when the doctor left, I curled myself up while I almost started hyperventilating and grabbed my phone to text Clay.

You
My leg is going to get amputated and I'm so sad :(

He was online right away and started typing.

Clay
I'm so sorry <3 I wish I could take it away from you, but I read about it and you will be able to do everything again and be cancer free!

You
But I'm only sixteen :(

Clay
I'm really tired right now so I might not be the most enthusiastic person, but do you want me to visit you?

You
You need sleep <3 sleep first and rest for a little. You deserve it. I'm going to ask for more medication for the pain so I can sleep too.

Clay
Stay strong, I love you. I know it's incredibly hard to have this happen, but after that you might even be cancer free :)

You
I guess that's true, I just wish to keep my leg.

Clay
Of course, I wish you would have been able to too, but I think this is better and will make you feel way less sick!

You
He also said the cancer spread a lot, I'm not sure where it spread, but I think I need loads of surgeries in a few days. I think it spread to my lungs and arm :(

Clay
I'm going to be there. I'm going to rest a lot and then I'll be there for you. I need to come back next week for chemo, but I'll stay with you after that <3

You
Thank you, I love you <3

Clay
I love you waaaaay more :) <3

I laid my phone down with a smile and looked at my parents and Sapnap who were talking to each other. I grabbed Sapnap's hand and he scooted closer.

'Do you think I can have extra medication?' I whispered. 'I have so much pain and I really want to sleep now.'

'Then we are going to ask that!' Sapnap answered with a smile. He pressed my button and a minute later a nurse ran in.

Sapnap smiled at her. 'He has a lot of pain and asked if he can get some extra medication so he can sleep.'

She nodded. 'Of course.'

She grabbed a few things and added them to the bag that was hanging up, attached to my IV. I got strong medication for the pain and to fall asleep more easily and I ended up falling asleep as soon as it started to kick in. I didn't wake up till the next morning because I was so tired.

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