When Dreams become Reality

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Sonakshi's POV, her mindset before and during Dev's iconic proposal. (Ep 76, S1)

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"If you love something truly, set them free. If it comes back to you, it is yours forever. If not, it was never yours to begin with."

Sonakshi read the quote in her book and wondered from where it originated. Wasn't it Jess Lair, the teacher? Doesn't matter. It was a beautiful, profound quote. However, what it did not state is how much it hurts, to let loved ones go. She had loved someone deeply, and waited to see if he would come to her. He did not, so they were probably not destined to be together. Her mind was accepting it but why does the heart ache so?

She closed her book. She needed to get some sleep. Her fever had come down but she was worn out by two days of constant crying. Dada and Elena had tried to cheer her up with junk food, but that had been temporary reprieve. Now that everyone was asleep, she was all alone with her miserable thoughts again. By now, Dev would be engaged to Natasha. Natasha Gujral: rich, sophisticated, well-traveled, beautiful. Ideal, really. They could go to Paris and bond over French patisserie. She could feel a fresh batch of tears threatening at her eyes, so she immediately diverted her thoughts to something else. She wished it was easy, though.

She woke up at the sound of the bell chiming, finding herself on the living room sofa. Did she fall asleep here? And was it morning already? This milkman would be the death of her. Did he have to come this early? She could barely keep her eyes open as she opened the door. "Don't your cows sleep?"

"Miss Bose?"

Okay, now she was definitely losing her mind. She had imagined the milkman as Dev yesterday, making Baba becoming very concerned for her. And now she was at it again. "Why are you talking like him?" She made the monumental effort to open her eyes fully, thus getting the real shock. "D-Dev? I mean, Mr. Dixit? What are you doing here?"

"Come with me." His voice was earnest.

"Where?" What was going on? And then, she noticed he was wearing the orange shirt that he had worn at their double date, the one she had chosen for him.

"Do you trust me?"

Trust? All this was very strange. She tried to figure out the exact intention behind this early morni... wait, was it morning yet? Looks like it was still late night. So, this late night visit.

"Let me change and come." She turned when she felt him grab her wrist. Why does he do that? Doesn't he understand that his touch sends her heart into an overdrive.

"I can't wait anymore. Let's go." He declared. She was very confused now. He can't wait for what? She followed him anyway.

They were driving the streets of Delhi now, sans traffic. What in the world was happening? Sonakshi needed to find out, but he seemed to be concentrating only on his driving. "Mr.Dixit, Where are we going, this late?"

"What nickname did you give me?" In reply, came the question, embarrassing her right away. She never had wanted him to find that out.

"Mr. Obhodro.....?"

"Yes, Mr.Rude. The one who doesn't smile, he looks like he is born with a frown, who doesn't understand colors. I understand colors, I just don't feel them."

He went on talking about his childhood and how he never noticed the orange of the rising sun. He went on talking about colors and other parts of his childhood without answering her most important, desperate and burning question: How was his engagement? He was being so weird. He was talking about some of their interactions long time ago. A tiny ray of hope was started to flicker in her heart. Really Mr. Dixit, you remember what I wore so long ago? Why? But she quickly squelched it and remained quiet, amused at his fumbling over her earrings, when they stopped at a hospital. Was he sick? She panicked but he informed her he was born there. And before she knew it, they were driving all through Delhi, in lanes so narrow, it was difficult for his car to enter. The houses were rundown and the neighborhoods looked very poor. Dev talked about his memory associated with each of those places They even went to the house he had grown up in, where he lost his father. She couldn't fathom the exact purpose of this late-night trip through his memory lanes, but it was touching and endearing to listen to him open up and talk. So, she gave up on trying to figure out the motivation, and just reveled in the moment that he had decided to share a tiny slice of his past with her. Wasn't that more than enough for her? Because his life and his future were already Natasha's.

He had stepped close to her now, almost in her personal space telling her proudly about all the things he was learning. When he praised her name and her looks, an unaccustomed thrill ran through her and she felt shy, all of a sudden. Maybe because she knew it was the closest that he would ever come to saying something romantic to her.

And that is why, when he declared in the next moment, that he loved her, she was thrown for a spin, her world off-kilter. Wait, what did he just say? He loved her? What does that mean? LOVED her? Is he joking? Is this some prank he was pulling to avenge the whole Neel issue? Worse, is he drunk? Or is she hallucinating, as she has already done so many times since her accident?

She just stared at him, trying to decipher the meaning of those three words he had just uttered, her heart flying at a thousand miles now. She was sure, there has been a huge misunderstanding, this couldn't possibly be happening. She needed to clear it right away. So, she did, even as her heart reproached her for trying to friendzone her own self, but her brain knew it was important. She had barely finished her sentence, when he cut her with a firm, "I love you as a man loves a woman."

The fact that this was happening for real, was jolting to her system. What does one do when something one had prayed so sincerely to the universe for, gets handed to you one day, unexpectedly? She had always believed roses, down-on-one-knee kind of proposals were the most romantic, but she was wrong. Baring one's heart, one's deepest feelings in an earnest manner is the most romantic way ever. He had just shown her that with his proposal. The dream that she had been harboring in secret, whose shattering had shattered her heart, was suddenly still intact. In fact, it was becoming a reality. The overwhelming emotions threatened to sneak out of her eyes, as she noticed him, waiting for her response, his eyes conveying so much uncertainty. Was he worried she would reject him? Really? Oh, he was so clueless, Mr. Obhodro!

She drove away his apprehension, fitting perfectly into his arms, like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. 

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