nine : what did i even do

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I'm laying in the dropship, looking at the ceiling.

"Briar. Come with me." Someone beside me says. I look at them and stand up. I follow them out of the dropship.

"Clarke. Where are you taking me?" I stop walking once we get in the middle of the forest.

"I have a question." She says.

"Well, ask it." I say.

"Bellamy. Why is he so upset?" She asks looking at me.

"That's a question you should ask him because I have no clue. I would like to know at much as you." I go to walk away, but she grabs my wrist.

"I tried. He's not talking to anyone." She says with a sympathetic look on her face.

"I'll try to talk to him." I say and she lets go. I walk back to camp and try to find Bellamy. I see him sitting in his and Octavia's tent. I sit beside him.
"Hey Bell." I wait for him to respond. He doesn't. "Everyone is kind of worried about you. Why you aren't talking to anyone. I'm worried, too... Bellamy, you have to say something. Help me understand." He looks at me. It looks like he's debating whether or not to talk to me.

"Bellamy, please. I need you. I need someone to talk to." I touch his hands and look him in his eyes. He just looks at me with tears forming in his eyes. I drop my head and let tears fall from my eyes. "God Bellamy. What did I do for you to ignore me like this? You've never done this. Ever." I look back at him. He's got tears running down his face.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" He says quickly and in a low voice.

I smile and then it fades.

"If I told you, it would have only gotten you hurt." I explain.

"How?" He asks.

"He told me that if I didn't listen to him, he was going to get someone to hurt Octavia. That would result in you getting hurt. Not physically, but mentally. I would rather sacrifice myself than let him hurt either one of you." I explain further.

"Let me tell you something. You almost died, Briar. He almost killed you! I can't let that happen. Okay? You have always been there for me, Briar. You've got to let me be there for you. I can't let you die." He says, on the verge of sobbing.

"I'm not going anywhere." I put my hands on the sides of his face. "Not for a long time." He puts his forehead against mine. We sit there just enjoying each other's presence.

After a while, he pulls away.

"So, Is Lucas nice?" He asks with a small smile on his face.

"Yes, he is. Actually, he's a decent person." I say, smiling.

"Do you like him?" He is still smiling, but it fades a bit.

"As a friend. I'm not ready for a new relationship." I reply with a serious face. "What about you? Any new girls?" I ask, my smile coming back.

"No. Like I said, no relationships until I figure out what's going on down here." He replies.

"Ugh, Boring!" I say with a stupid smile on my face. He grins.

"Oh yeah? I'm boring?" He says coming closer to me. He starts tickling me.

"Bell! No." I start laughing. He's laughing, too.

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