#GirlsShitToo

Runsberger's Punishment

Monday morning, the intercom came on, and I heard, "Dallas Delaney, please come to the principal's office."

As much as I wanted to sneak out to the parking lot and take a coffee run, I had to go. I couldn't hit delete and run away forever.

When I walked into the room, Ms. Brooks was sitting there, looking downcast, and I got this horrible feeling in my stomach, with all the fears that had been brewing over the weekend beginning to churn again and my heart beating fast, making me wonder why I'd thought another coffee would've been a good idea.

"Sit down, Dallas," Runsberger said. I obliged him and he said, "Well, that was quite the pep rally fiasco we had on Friday, wasn't it?"

I wanted to tell him, "It's better to have the school cheering for equality than for a sucky basketball team," but I didn't. I just nodded.

"Is there a reason I haven't heard back from your parents?"

I shrugged.

"Well then. Ms. Brooks has told me that this thing started as a project for her class." He paused before saying, "It needs to stop."

"Why?"

"I think that should be obvious. We can't have something so vulgar associated with the school. You were supposed to be doing this for a grade, Ms. Delaney, not for shock value." He emphasized the "Ms.," making it sound like "Mizz." I didn't like it.

"I don't think Dallas was doing it for shock value. I think her project is brilliant," said Ms. Brooks.

"It's vulgar and offensive!"

I couldn't help myself. "You think the fact girls shit is offensive?" I asked.

Maintaining an unnecessary volume, he said, "Girls using cuss words is vulgar, and I think anything having to do with bodily waste is fit for elementary school humor, and not high school academics. We're shaping students into professionals here."

"What about boys using cuss words?" Ms. Brooks asked him.

"What?"

"You only said you think girls using cuss words is vulgar. What about boys?"

"Boys will be boys. But ladies need to act like ladies." Not caring about the shock registering on Ms. Brooks' face, he said, "Alice, are you telling me that you condone and encourage this sort of behavior? One of your students coming in here and cussing at me? Disruptions at school events?"

"I don't think she cussed at you. And she didn't disrupt the pep rally—everyone else was rallying for her. She wasn't leading them; they were leading themselves in support of her movement."

"Ms. Brooks, the administration already had a hard enough time bending over to meet the so-called needs of your generation of teachers, but we won't bend over anymore. Tradition has its place in schooling. In fact, I'm thinking we might need to rethink the amendment to the policy that now allows seniors to do applied projects in lieu of papers. I'm actually wondering how that amendment passed in the first place. How are our seniors going to survive in the world if they don't know how to persuade people through the written word, using the Aristotelian structure?"

"Mr. Runsberger, please. This social media project involves an interactive audience, allowing much more room for collaboration and cooperation and compromise. The traditional argumentative paper will always have its place, but should it maintain so much dominance over all argumentative forms?"

"Yes."

"But it was birthed by the patriarchy, and its sole mission is to convert the reader. It's a conquest! Don't you see a problem with — "