Chapter 25: weird feeling

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"Jimin," Jungkook called out, talking to Jimin as their little boy ran towards his room and changed himself into new clothes – all on his own, as he insisted.

"Yeah, what is it, love?" Jimin turned to him, his eyes lingered at the place where Jikook disappeared into.

"Thank you for that," Jungkook told him, sincerely. "You know, for not telling Jikook... about that. I know it's hard to withhold the truth especially when it's all you've ever wanted to say, but you did. Thank you."

"You really don't need to thank me, kook," Jimin dismissed, whilst the faint smile that was plastered on his lips hinted a tinge of melancholy – a tragedy of being there for his family yet not being acknowledged for who he truly is. "It's my karma,"

"Huh?" Jungkook cocked a brow, sensing the change of mood that was setting on Jimin.

There were these looming dark clouds that somehow hovered and lingered in Jimin's eyes making them look dull...and empty. Despite the feeling of emptiness, it was raw; it was real buried emotions and in the flicker of the moment Jimin felt bare. He wanted to strip off everything and lay it down there so he won't ever have to carry the burden of these toxic feelings though he knows it won't be like that, not until the truth his supressing gets out.

"It's my karma," He repeated, "the consequences of my actions – my punishment." He sounded so broken and lost, Jungkook heard the dropping of tones at each word and by the last word; his voice sounded close to cracking.

"I've left you, left you at the time you needed me the most, I left you pregnant and never looked at you back to check on what happened. And when I came back, it's all too late. I know I've been a jerk when we met, but I didn't know what to do, kook. I had to mask the insecurities I've accumulated and the gap that I've created between us with the confidence and stubbornness you hated. It's like everything I've garnered through the years was nothing because as much as people knew about me, I've started to know less about you – I tried to act like how we were before because I don't know how to deal with the new you."

"Jikook not knowing about me is my karma because I left him just when he was still inside you. Not only was I a bad man for tearing your heart apart and leaving you all so broken, I was also a bad father for leaving my unborn child with only a single father."

"Jimin," Jungkook spoke because he could see now, Jimin was crying.

"I know in myself I don't deserve to be called his father but I'm trying to change that, kook. I'm trying so hard. This is all new to me as much as this is all I ever wanted to have. I'm adjusting and trying to balance everything out, I may not be doing an excellent job but I'm trying." Jimin confessed, looking at Jungkook's eyes, he wasn't pleading or anything, just the sole action of expressing himself with honesty.

"So I understand if you can't tell me about him, I'll gladly move in your own pace. It's you who knows him best, it's you who gave life to him so if there's anyone who knows what's best for Jikook – it's you. Whatever you decide, I'll respect that. At this moment, I'm just grateful you even gave me the chance to spend time with him, to get to know him because, love, Jikook's the most amazing child I've met and it's all because of you." Jimin began to wipe the tears that blurred his vision.

Jungkook took little steps towards Jimin, his hands gently finding their way to Jimin's wrists, making the older stare into the piercing gaze that lingered at him. "J-Jungkook,"Jimin was taken aback, the proximity of it all said so much, screamed at his ears and pounded in his chest.

"Thank you," Jungkook murmured, slowly his fingers left a hollow on Jimin's wrist and in a deliberate way as if knowing where to move and to find, he cupped Jimin's face and pulled him closer.

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