Chagara - Chaos in the Darkness (Levi x OC Fanfic / AttackOnTitan)

5. Walking in the dark

8 pm. The dining room was beginning to empty. Levi looked bored out of the window into the darkness and swirled his teacup. It seemed to be another cold night. Snowflakes were falling. The white landscape looked so peaceful.

In the window pane he saw the reflection of Erwin talking to Shadis and this Peter. The four of them had dinner together at one of the tables. Erwin listened with interest to Shadis' explanations about the recruits.

Levi's eyes wandered to the few soldiers who had come into the dining room later than the recruits. Some had fresh injuries. None of them looked bad. But it confirmed his suspicion from yesterday. They had been on a mission. And the more serious injuries were certainly being treated in the infirmary. Or tried to be treated. Were there also any deaths?

Levi did not know a single one of these soldiers. And this irritated him. They were fighting Titans far from the walls and were not part of the Scout Regiment. Who were they and their commander Peter? Why were they so important to Erwin? And where was Chagara?

He had a bone to pick with her. He did not tolerate stealing food. Could he punish her now or not until the new year? Until she was an officially member of the Scout Regiment? Levi came back to reality when he saw two soldiers moving towards his table. They stopped behind Peter and bent down to him.

"There's a cake and Chagara is not around. That's strange. Where is she?," one whispered.

"Good question," Levi thought and took a sip. The soldier's face impressed Levi. If he was part of Peter's troop and therefore also faced Titans, how could he have so many laugh lines around his eyes? Where did he get the strength to stay so positive?

"I have already sent her to the headquarters of the Scout Regiment. She has a few things to take care of. New uniforms, your quarters, make room for our horses," Peter replied quietly, trying not to disturb Erwin and Shadis in their conversation.

"What, alone?" the other murmured with a sullen face.

"No, with a piece of cake," Peter replied, slightly annoyed. "Yes, alone," he added.

"In this weather?" The sullen face seemed to be looking for an argument. That he had a commander in front of him probably didn't matter to him.

"Orders are orders," Peter replied, ending the conversation.

The soldier with the optimistic expression seemed to have sense. Before his friend could start an argument, he pulled his scowling comrade with him. Both of them also were only wearing their training suits. Levi frowned. New uniforms? Why? What other uniforms did they wear before? And why had he sent Chagara off alone in this weather? And what was that feeling? Discomfort? Shame?

He had suspected the girl wrongly, judged her too soon. And he had eaten part of another soldier's ration. Although, she had forced him to eat her piece of cake.

Peter looked up questioningly from his dinner plate as Levi suddenly stood up and said goodbye to Shadis, Erwin and him.

"Levi, wait," Peter said.

The one he addressed turned to face him.

"Here." With that he handed Levi a napkin.

When Levi did not directly understand the gesture, Peter only briefly pointed to the chocolate stains on Levi's hand before returning his attention to the conversation and his food.

Levi had accepted the napkin gratefully. The hesitation, however, had only been noticed by Erwin. The half-full teacup had also only been noticed by Erwin. Such things did not happen. Not to Levi.

"So it's on your mind, Levi," thought Erwin. "Or shall I say, she is on your mind?"

With his tray and the unused napkin in his hand, Levi crossed the room.

"Isn't that Levi?" he heard murmuring behind him.

"Is he only as tall as Chagara?"

"No, she's a good five centimetres shorter," Levi thought.

"Yeah, could be. From the figure too," he heard an assessment.

"No, that's not true. My hips are much wider. That's why I don't lose my uniform trousers," Levi explained in his mind.

With that thought, he went to the kitchen where he put down his tray. A young girl smiled and thanked him for it. Levi did not look at her. But just as he was about to leave the kitchen, he turned around.

"Oi," he addressed the girl, which made her blush.

"Chagara," Levi began.

The girl looked at him questioningly, but then she understood. "Do you mean Ayumi?"

"Ayumi?" repeated Levi slowly.

"Mmh," the girl nodded.

"Then I guess I mean her." With those words, he left the kitchen. Will it snow all night? It might take twice as long as usual to get to the headquarters in this weather. Levi frowned. When had she left? Right after their last crash? Then she would be there by now. If nothing had happened to her. Levi's eyebrows narrowed. How could anyone send a soldier out alone in this weather? What if the horse spooks? What if the rider falls off. Unconscious. Would one survive such a cold night then? Levi shook his head and loosened his cravat slightly. While he was considering whether to check on the horses, he heard low murmurs. Instinctively he followed the murmur until he saw the three people.

Levi stopped at the corner and peered into the corridor. There were the two giants who had earlier questioned Peter about Chagara's whereabouts. Opposite them was a young soldier. Almost two heads shorter, but still taller than Levi. He cried quietly.

"Don't take it so hard, Jimmy!" the soldier with the laugh lines tried to cheer him up.

"Right, this isn't the end. Right, Paul?" the other giant tried.

"Mmh," was Paul's only reply.

Neither sounded convincing to Levi.

Probably not to Jimmy either, because he continued to sob. "Do I really have to burn them?" whispered Jimmy.

"No, not the uniforms. You detach the emblems. You have to burn those. The uniforms can be used again with different emblems," Paul explained to him. "Can you help him with that, Ron?"

"Sure," Ron answered. "Do you have Chagara's uniform too?"

"Yeah." Jimmy pulled a uniform jacket out of the bag.

What kind of emblem was that? At a first cursory glance it was easily mistaken for the symbol of the Scout Regiment. On purpose? But when Levi took a closer look, he realized that there was a gap in the middle of the white wing as well as of the blue wing. Levi had never seen this emblem before. And judging by the conversation, it was also the last time he would see this symbol.

"Good. Let's get it over with then," Ron said, patting Jimmy on the shoulder. He nodded, repacked Chagara's uniform jacket and followed Ron with his head down.

Levi had seen and heard enough and continued his way. It was only an emblem. But it had a meaning. How would he feel if one day he had to take off the symbol of the Scout Regiment? For him, it was the sign for freedom. It had memories. Of his friends. Isabel, Furlan, Erwin, Mike, Hanji. His team. His soldiers. And it was - even if he hated to admit it - his hope for a life without Titans. Without walls. Without fear.

Once in his room, he took off his jacket, hung it over the back of the chair, went into the bathroom and turned on the water. It rushed. But nothing else happened. Levi shook his head. About himself? Carefully he ran his index finger along the chocolate trail. Her lips didn't seem as narrow as his. "Ayumi, then. Mh?" he mumbled to himself and reached for the bar of soap.