Peter Parker Imagines

4 - Confusion

You toss and turn awake in bed, unable to sleep due to the new information that stuck in your mind like a huge creature about to engulf you. You roll over to look at your clock. Three A.M.

Three days ago Peter had asked you to walk home with him, as you live really close. You've both been best friends for years but you can never tell whether the butterflies you get around him are simply platonic excitement or a secret attraction. Either way you looked forward to hometime, excited to have Peter to yourself for a bit - away from the chaos of school.

Once the day had finally ended, you made your way to the gates to see Peter already there waiting.

"Hey Pete. Is everything okay? You look nervous."

"Y- yeah I'm fine... are you?" He deflected. He was definitely lying. He was clenching and unclenching his hands and shaking them as if to dry off sweat, and he was clearly biting the inside of his cheeks - something he always did when he was nervous, you had been his best friend long enough to know that.

"Hmm... sure Peter." You two began walking down the street which was still riddled with other rowdy school kids on their way home. "What was it you wanted to tell me?"

"O- oh... um. Can we wait till there's less people around... please?" What was with him? Was he sick? Had something happened?

"Yeah of course." You laugh, nervous yourself at this point.

Once the swarm of kids began to clear, Peter took a deep breath and turned to you, grabbing your shoulders gently to stop you and turn you to face him. He then pushed you backwards into an alleyway at the side of the path, out of sight from passers-by. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before reopening them.

"Peter what are you doing?"

"Sh. So I asked to walk home with you because I want to tell you something and I want you to promise not to get mad. Please."

You were taken aback. "Alright..." You hesitated.

"Alright." Peter repeated. "I'm Spiderman."

"W- what?!" You stuttered.

"Yeah. But please don't get mad I wanted to tell you I really did please believe me but I was scared and I didn't want you to worry and I guess I also didn't want you to hate me," he spat out quickly, panicking.

You were speechless. "Peter you're joking."

"I'm not I swear."

"Why didn't you tell me? I'm your best friend Peter!"

"I didn't want you to hate me or worry about me!"

"Who else knows Peter?"

"Ned... and MJ."

You scoffed. "Really?! I'm your best friend Peter! It doesn't matter that they know if you want them to know go tell them but tell me as well! If you really cared about me you'd have told me too."

"Please y/n..." He began moving towards you.

"Stop! I'm done." You start walking away, tears forming in your eyes.

"No I can't do without you! Don't do this to me y/n I need you. Please listen." Peter was in tears now, desperately trying to hold them back.

"If I really mean that much to you then I would have known sooner. Seems like you're pretty cosy with MJ too why don't you go run along to her." Peter stopped at your words, hurt, but you didn't care. You appreciated him telling you but waiting this long? He quite clearly didn't think of you they way you thought of him. With that you ran away in tears leaving your ex-best friend in the alley behind you.

You hadn't gone into school for 3 days. You couldn't face it.

And here you are, on sleepless night number 3. What was it keeping you awake? Anger at Peter for not telling you? Sadness at losing him? Worry about what danger he was getting himself into? You don't know.

*tap tap*

Your thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a small tapping noise coming from your window. After overcoming the fear you slip out of bed into the cold air, shivering as you do so, and tug back the curtains to reveal a soaking wet Peter looking longingly at you. Oh.

You pity him and reach out, unlocking the window and opening it enough for him to finish opening it himself, before the feelings bubble back and you turn away from him with teary eyes. "Why are you here?"

"I needed to see you, y/n."

"I told you I didn't want anything to do with you... you have new friends why would you need me?"

"They're not you." He carefully turned you to face him. He was in his spidey suit, drenched from the pounding rain outside, his curls dropping over his face. "I wanted to clear things up. You were the only person I ever wanted to know I'm Spiderman because you are the only person who truly matters to me. I didn't wanna anyone else to know, but Ned found out when I crawled in after a mission to find him sat on my bed. He was waiting for me to get back from my 'Stark internship' but caught me red handed so I had no choice but to tell him. And as for MJ, I didn't tell her..." he paused, looking embarrassed. "She kinda... told me...? Apparently she's very observant and figured it out which is kinda humiliating. Anyway so I never actually told either of them, you were the only person I planned to tell but every time I thought about it I was plagued with other thoughts about how you'd react and... I was scared. I couldn't lose you."

You have to take a moment to process what he's just said so you stagger back, perching on the edge of your bed.

"Y/n you mean so much to me. So so much. I can't keep doing this not-talking thing. You know my anxiety can't handle it. I miss seeing your face when I turn the corner to meet you before school. I miss hearing you answer from the back of the class. I miss you, y/n, with all my heart." With that he pulls you up from where you were sat, drawing you in for a tight hug. Salty tears trickle down your already tear-stained face as you weep into his arms, feeling safe in his clutch.

"I'm sorry Peter."

With that he tilts your chin up and kisses you. He feels warm, and sincere. Every bit of anger or sadness you felt towards him melts away at his gentle touch and your stomach erupts in a flurry of butterflies, except this time there is no confusion.

You eventually pull away, both silent in your happiness. "No, I'm sorry y/n." He murmurs as he pulls you in once more.