Fathers (Book 4 girlxgirl)

Resolving Issues

I feel... better.

I lean forward as I sit in the chair of the hospital room, waiting for him to come back.

I didn't think I would, but I do. After everything, I thought I wouldn't feel very good. Getting my dad involved in the supernatural world, even if he was already part of it, despite not knowing he was. I thought it would've gotten him killed. And it almost did, multiple times. But I feel better knowing that he made it through. Plus, he handled the whole vampire thing really well. A lot better than I did when I first heard about it. Of course, I was a kid when I found out. I didn't have the kind of life experience he's had. Guess it makes sense that he handled it better.

Still, he knows a big part of my life now. He understands who I am in a way that only B ever really has. So maybe we could have an actual relationship. Which isn't something I thought I could have when I first started this whole thing. I didn't think I could have any kind of father when I gave him a call and we had that conversation. Now I actually have one. I'm not really sure how to feel about that. The idea of having one was always something I just dismissed. Even with Giles when he tried to be the kind've guy for me that he was for B. He's been a good guy to me.

But he's not someone I ever really thought of like a dad. In part because of how badly my own dad treated me when I was young. It feels like he's really grown since then. He's a better person now. He proved that when he tried to keep me out of harm's way with his problems. That wasn't something he'd ever really done when I was a kid. Now he does. I guess that means we can have a relationship now. We can actually have a real father daughter relationship. Assuming he wants one with me anyway.

For all I know, he's been thinking about this since he almost died and no longer wants to see me. Which I guess I could understand if he wants that. All this insanity is a lot to handle. Even if I found a way to deal with it, my dad might not want to have to deal with it. I hope he doesn't though. I'm sure I could still have some kind of relationship with him even if he doesn't want to know about vampires and other stuff more than he does. It wouldn't be as good as I want it to be, but I could live with it.

If he wants any kind of relationship at all. I'll have to talk to him about it.

The door opens and he's wheeled in on his wheelchair. He sees him and it makes him smile.

"Hey firecracker."

"Hey dad. How are you feeling?"

"Pretty sure that's what the tests were for. Probably want to ask my nurse that."

My dad looks up at his nurse from the wheelchair and it has me doing the same from my position.

"He's doing fine. In fact, you can take him home if you want."

Take him home?

"You're sure?"

The nurse follows up to answer.

"Absolutely. We think he just overexerted himself after being so banged up before. He should be fine so long as he rests. No exercising for a while, you hear?"

Exercising? Is that what he told them?

He gives her a thumbs up.

"Got it doc."

I guess it's as good an explanation as any.

She looks at me.

"He's already signed the release papers. You can take him home any time."

I smile back at her then focus my attention on him.

"Thanks... you ready to go?"

"Definitely."

He starts to get out of the chair and the nurse puts her hands on his shoulders to stop him.

"When you get to the door."

My dad takes a pretty annoyed breath.

"Fine."

I stand up and make my way to him. The nurse turns him around so he's facing the door, giving me easy access to the back of the chair. I put my hands on the handles and push him out the door. The nurse says something as we go.

"Take care."

We don't really respond as I turn down the hall to the front of the hospital.

I might as well just ask.

"So... you actually good?"

He tries to look at me but it's hard to do.

"What?"

"Come on dad, I know you. I'm guessing you weren't telling them everything."

"Well, I didn't exactly tell them what I was doing before I collapsed."

Right...

"Good call, sounds like you have the chops to handle the whole vampire thing."

He doesn't say anything for a long while. It has me stopping our progress and turning to meet his look.

"Dad?"

"I'm fine. I just..."

My dad doesn't finish the sentence.

"What?"

After a moment, he reaches out for me and I take his hand.

"I think it's great that you're out there. Fighting the vampires and whatever else is going on. But... it's probably going to take sometime for me to get used to it. I was pretty hyped up after the blood transfusion. I think it helped make things a little easier to accept. Now that it's wearing off though, I don't know how I feel about it."

I don't really respond to that.

"I'll get there. It's just..."

"You're not there yet. I get it."

He squeezes my hand.

"I hope that's okay."

I squeeze his hand back.

"It's cool dad, I get it. Take all the time you need."

We smile at each other for a long silence. Eventually, we let go of our hands and I move back behind him, pushing him towards the door.

"Firecracker?"

"Yeah dad."

"So, you said that you and Buffy aren't sisters."

Is he really asking about this?

"No, definitely not."

"She seems to really care about you."

"She does... and I care about her too."

There's a long silence as we make our turn around a corner down towards the front of the hospital before he says anything.

"How much do you care about her exactly?"

I should probably just play it off.

"We've been through a lot together."

"Seems like she's willing to go through a lot more with you. Coming here and helping you through all this. I don't know too many people who would be willing to go that far for someone."

He's not wrong.

"B's a special girl, that's for sure."

The automatic doors of the hospital open and we walk through it, getting outside.

"I hope she makes you happy."

Wait, what is he saying?

We stop where we were supposed to. I move in front of him to help him get up finally.

"Dad..."

He reaches out and takes my hand.

"I just want you to be happy firecracker. No matter who it is."

I watch him for a while to make sure he does mean it, if I'm reading it right.

"Thank you dad, that means a lot. But... she and I aren't like that, at least not anymore. We were for a long time. But..."

I don't really finish explaining things. He pushes himself up out of the chair so that he's standing, facing me.

"Well, I don't really know much about what happened between you, but she obviously cares about more than either of you might want to admit. I just... want you to know that I'm happy for you. Whoever you want to be with."

I smile at him.

"Thanks dad."

I lean in and hug him, which he returns firmly. It goes on for a while with us enjoying each other. Eventually he pulls back and I do the same. We turn and make our way from the hospital.