21: Sundrop

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Bruno was up with the sun to do deliveries for the triplets birthday and pick up the special gift we'd gotten them. I put the finishing stitches into Maya's dress as she called to me.

"We're going to the Casita for tea with Abuela!" Maya called.

"Have fun!" I called back. I smiled as I finished off the embroidery. I made sure it was consistent before gathering the two dresses and new runna.

I set the runna on Fernando's pillow, then the first dress on Maya's bed.

I opened Sofia's door to place the last dress and stopped suddenly. "Sofia?" She was sitting in front of a mirror. I'd expected her to have gone with the others for tea.

"Mami!" She jumped from her sitting position in front of the mirror. She hid her hands behind her back. She was wearing one of Bruno's shirts and a poorly hemmed pair of Fernando's pants.

My eyes went wide as I realized she'd cut off her braid in a horribly uneven line. "Oh, mi vida, what did you do to your hair?"

"I..." Sofia's head dropped as she showed me the scissors and braid. "I cut it. Please don't be mad at me!"

"I'm not mad," I made her tear stained face look up at me. "I'd have done it for you if you had asked. This won't be easy to fix." I looked at her hair. "It's all uneven. And this spot! It's far too close to your head!"

"You're really not mad?"

"Of course not, mi vida. Hair is just that. I only want one thing in life." I smiled and kissed her forehead. "I only want for your happiness."

Sofia sniffled as she hugged me tightly. "I thought you'd be mad."

"Never, mi vida."

"I... I want to show you something..." She let go of me. "I made it myself because I didn't know if you would..."

"I'd make you anything you want," I said gently as Sofia knelt by her bed.

"I've been collecting your scraps and taking bits of old dresses too make..." She held up a patchwork runna. "This..."

I sat beside her, my cane falling beside us. "Mi vida..." I touched the work. She'd been working on this for a long time. There were bits of every dress I could remember making in three years.

"You always told Maya there was some things we don't say. I just thought it was one of those things." Sofia sniffled again. "Something everyone thinks but no one says."

I touched Sofia's face. "I'm sorry, mi vida. I never meant to make you feel like you couldn't tell me everything."

"I just don't know if you'd understand," she said, rubbing her face on the patch work.

"I can't try to understand unless you tell me," I smiled comfortingly.

"Mami..." Sofia took a deep breath and looked up at me. "I don't think I'm a girl."

I nodded. "I do understand and it's-"

"But I don't think I'm a boy either," Sofia said quickly. "I don't know what I am."

I grabbed Sofia's hand. "You don't have to, mi vida. You can be whoever and do whatever you want. What do you want to be?"

"I want... I want to use... He..." he hugged me tightly. "And can you call me Sol?"

"Like the sun?" I smiled.

He nodded into my shoulder.

"I love it, Sol." He cried into my shoulder but I could see his father's lopsided smile on his face. I kissed the top of his head. "Mi pequeña gota de sol."

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