words ft. lyrics

when i was drowning that's when i could finally breathe

she fell. and she hit hard. she created a pixellated reality for herself when there was already a high definition one surrounding her. she made up a realm of limitless possibilities because she wanted to escape the heavy burden of reality. 

but the bubble she built up around herself burst. it was just a bubble after all. but unlike other bubbles that burst instantly, this one sucked the air around her slowly, as if each time air escaped, a fragment of her soul was drained from her. it was a long and painless process, but once all air is gone... 

pop.

she gasped for air but it was too late. all the air had been sucked out from her bubble. the same way all the air was sucked from her lungs, leaving her breathless, but not the kind where infatuation swept her off her feet. she was swept off her feet as she plunged down an abyss. it was quiet. she couldn't even scream. she felt choked. she just watched as darkness enveloped her, seeming to welcome her more than the world outside of her bubble. 

out of nowhere, she felt a tight grip around her waist. it seemed to pull her forward, but all she could see was darkness. her eyelids felt heavy. one could only last for three minutes without air.

then suddenly, light. 

even though her eyes were in slits, the bright light bore right into them, making her want to shield her eyes. but she couldn't. there was something so entrancing, so alluring, so... 

comforting.

she opened her eyes and took a deep breath.

wait. breath.

she started swallowing mouthfuls of air. her breathing was rapid. never in her life had she felt so happy, so relieved, so grateful. 

her near-death experience made her realise that whenever she thought of dying, she merely wanted an escape from this harsh reality. but in actual fact, she needed a lifeline to pull her back because she got lost in the fragile world she created. the glass was tinted from the inside — people watched her getting sucked deeper into her world but she had no clue what was happening around her. and she failed to notice the hairline cracks in the glass she thought was perfect. as the glass slowly shattered around her, all that was left was the flimsy, life-sucking bubble.

- 

ironically, only when she was breathless from chasing the perfect pixellated reality was she able to inhale gulps of air that anchored her back to this world. 

∞

song: clean // taylor swift